di'soulless beat

June 24th, the beach.

2009-06-26T13:59:00.003+08:00

It was a cold cloudy day. Today, we do our thing the other way. Not the rock as we used to. But, the pipe.

It's much closer than the rock. I know, I shouldn't punish myself with this direction, 'cause its not enough. Which is why, today I will run to the rock. Don't matter if it's going to rain or whatever. I'm not going to stop punishing myself until Monday. Sunday will be the last day that I would do that. After that, we'll see.

I'm sorry if I stole your heart, and accidentally broke it when you find out that I stole it. If you're here and see what the ~~fuck~~ am I doing, maybe I could steal it back and try to fix it, and give it back to you.

I said, 'we'. Who was that we that I was talking about..? Me and who? Who was it that was with me? I don't know, you don't know.. Keep that a mystery. Or maybe you can be a detective and find out who that was.

So today, will be the second last day that I would suffer myself. The last day would be Saturday. Today, Friday, I will suffer myself as I ran through the sands to the rock. And as for Saturday, I'm going to suffer myself, running to Telisai Beach. All the way from my house.

Is that far? Yes it's quite far. It took a hour even if I jogged all the way from home to Telisai Beach and back home. The heck I care about me suffering. I hope I'd just die. Well, I'm going to get ready now. Until the next post.

Update update update..

2009-06-25T01:37:00.003+08:00

I'm not going to sleep tonight. Don't worry, even if I wanted to sleep, I can't. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I felt like screaming. I know I went to the beach just now, but I didn't have any chance to do so.

I plan to continue my To Do List, which is write a lyric about my condition right now. I was thinking of Malay - English song. And I just got the Malay ones. Whatever it is, I won't share it until it's finished. I hope I manage to finish it before my Mock Exam starts.

Okay, what's up with the title of this post? I updated like everyday now, in my blog. Since that bread picture thing.. Until now. So yeah.. Plus, there's a new discussion added in the bassruler company website. It's the result of the quizzes that I took. Check it out by clicking here.

Okay, not to waste anymore of my time. This is me, signing out from my blog.

PS: I'm still on my MSN though. :p

5PM.

2009-06-24T16:56:00.002+08:00

Today I'm going to jog again. This time I'm not going to walk anymore. This time I will not go easy on myself. This is who I was, and this is what I am now. You changed me, and now you changed me back. You're the special one who kidnap my heart, and took my soul.

I swear, I'm not going to stop running. I made you angry, cry, and even break your heart. So I'm going to break my own heart, and I am punish myself through everything I can. I know you said that you have forgiven me, but that is not enough. You said that saying sorry is not enough, now I said the other way, forgiving me is not enough.

I swear you, everything written on this blog and the bassruler company are all the truth in my life. So I swear you, that self punishment on myself do exist.

Until the next painful writings..

Today, Sim Kim Huat Department.

2009-06-23T19:09:00.003+08:00

I went to Tutong Town with my parents to measure my size for Hari Raya Aidilfitri, and the only shop I remember I was in was SKH. That's where I bought two different kind of kerupok which was Potato Chips and Cheezels. After that, I went somewhere close to SKH, and bough two kind of drinks which was Mirinda and Sarsi. Well I missed the taste of Sarsi. : )

This messed up shoe picture that I took is made out of boredom while waiting for my parents to end their shopping. This was at SKH, where there was suppose to be water in the pool.

In case you wondered how I take these pictures, well I borrowed my brother's phone, and I let him borrow my laptop. But too bad he didn't use it. Thanks for letting me borrowing your phone bro! If not, I'd be bored waiting, and plus I'll have to answer the person who tries to talks to me while I was sitting. But, let's not talk about that. :p

Well, blog later on.

I am, changing back.

2009-06-23T00:50:00.004+08:00

I had a very hard time, trying to sleep last night, and so is tonight..

Yesterday, it was 1AM, I lay in bed for some time, but no sign of sleepy feeling. Nothing. I was thinking about her. Her who I still love. Her who I have mistakenly getting away of. Her, who I have punished myself through pain, trying to make it equal as the pain that I gave her.

It's about an hour now, but still, nothing. Maybe this is what they called, insomnia. I guess I worried too much that I won't going to succeed this time. I then get up from my bed, and walked in the bathroom. As I opened the door, I looked myself in the mirror, saying.. "What have you done? I hate you." Inside, I felt the rage, and if I am so called 'free', I would break every single mirror that I see, but I'm not.

I took off my clothes, and shiver myself in the shower. I didn't really feel anything. Not the cold, not the pain, and not the loneliness. And what I remember, it was raining last night. Why can't I feel anything? Anything at all? I hope I would just heal from this nonsense..

As I finished with shivering myself, I once again head towards the mirror, and look through my own eyes. What I saw, was the pain. The pain after all the sins that I did. To everyone, but I realize, that her who I once love, was the most sinful things that I have done. And then the tears. I can't believe it came back. Such warmth, from my tears, it's wonderful, and in the same time, painful.

Though, it's wonderful. But I did not cry, for this whole time because I made a promise out of myself not to. Yes, that's a stupid promise, and it's the only way to keep me strong. Just think without tears. I introduced myself to that word, three years ago. Until now, it breaks.

3AM, I sat there on the red chair. Searching some more poems. That will be the last time I am going to check out poems. 'Cause after this last time, I'm going to continue to make my lyrics, and the goal, is to finish at least two in a short time.

About 3:15AM, my stomach started to growl. Yes, obviously I am hungry. I try to search for some food in the kitchen, and what I found was bread. There's nothing else. So, it's toast time. You'll never know how hungry and so incredibly desperate I was. I mean really.. Take a look.

A for Asri, H for.. well, let's not mention the name. You know who it is. It took me a long time too to make this. About.. I don't know, 40 minutes? Like I care about the time.. It's almost 4AM, and I took another picture while waiting for the bread to toast out.

After I ate those, I actually make a video. Turns out it's not good as expected. But what I recorded was me 'checking out' the wall. I'll post pictures instead.

Don't I look like an idiot? The video was actually punching kicking the wall. Do you want to look at the bleeding part instead? I'm kidding. I wasn't bleeding. But it did leave marks. Well I deserve that.
'Cause I didn't ask for any of this.

Now, this is the beginning of bassruler company. Also, the beginning of the old me. I will never change back to whom I was before, cruel, major idiot, yet fearful and painful me. It's the end of that me. Goodbye.

I

2009-06-21T19:17:00.003+08:00

Hey. If you scroll down this blog, you'll see that I have uploaded the pictures that I took at the beach. Sorry it take so long to do it.

I, now automatically, without a doubt, am a fan of Owl City, Kill Paradise, and also Vibekingz feat. Maliq. Their songs really made me miss my old self. The old self where I am much, what I so called 'free'. I'd do everything I want to do without even thinking. Listen, and feel this one, it's my favorite of Owl City

I opened my eyes last night and saw you in the low light
Walking down by the bay, on the shore, staring up at the planes that aren’t there anymore
I was feeling the night grow old ,and you were looking so cold
Like an introvert, I drew my over shirt, around my arms and began to shiver violently
Before you happened to look, and see, the tunnels all around me,
Running into the dark, underground,
All the subways around create a great sound,
To my motion fatigue: farewell,
With your ear to a seashell,
You can hear the waves, in underwater caves
As if you actually were inside a saltwater room,

Chorus:
Time together is just never quite enough
When you and I are alone, I’ve never felt so at home
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
We need time, only time
When we’re apart whatever are you thinking of?
If this is what I call home, why does it feel so alone?
So tell me darling, do you wish we’d fall in love?
All the time, all the time

Can you believe that the crew, has gone and wouldn’t let me sign on?
All my islands have sunk, in the deep, so I can hardly relax or even oversleep,
I feel as if I were home, some nights, when we count all the ship lights,
I guess I’ll never know, why sparrows love the snow,
We’ll turn off all of the lights and set this ballroom aglow,

So tell me darling do you wish we'd fall in love,
All the time,

Chorus:
Time together is just never quite enough
When you and I are alone, I’ve never felt so at home
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
We need time, only time
When we’re apart whatever are you thinking of?
If this is what I call home, why does it feel so alone?
So tell me darling, do you wish we’d fall in love?
All the time, all the time

Time together is just never quite enough
When we're apart whatever are you thinking of?
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
So tell me darling do you wish we'd fall in love
All the time..

My favorite part, 'If this is what I called home, why does it feel so alone?' . I'm never going to be tired of this. And so is this..

Yeah baby, I hope you don't misunderstand me. But I have to go..
Oh oh oh oohhh yeah,
Oh oh oh oohhh yeah,

My philosophy was you and me,
Even in my dreams, it is you I see,
The bubble pops; the puzzle ain't complete,
Can't you see?
You was all I needed,
Now I'm sad, trying to hold back,
But tears running fast,
Will this pain ever pass?
Honestly, I feel weak,
It is hard to explain, but you drive me insane,

Girl, I wrote this letter to let you know forever,
I keep you in my heart when I'm leaving you boo,
Girl, I wrote this letter and it ain't getting better,
That is why I can't be with you,
P.S. I still love you,

My only question: do you miss me when I am gone?
Tell me girl, tell me..

It is reality that you're playing me,
You took my air to breath,
Cause I was blind to see,
Now I know that I have to go,
Why don't you see?
I was all you needed,
Wanna stay, but it ain't okay,
That he is with you,
And it's me who's alone,

Girl, I wrote this letter to let you know forever,
I keep you in my heart when I'm leaving you boo,
Girl, I wrote this letter and it ain't getting better,
That is why I can't be with you,
P.S. I still love you,

I was the one that you could always count on, lean on,
but those days are gone,
All we have are memories of better days,
Now I need to say goodbye,

Girl, I wrote this letter to let you know forever,
I keep you in my heart when I'm leaving you boo,
Girl, I wrote this letter and it ain't getting better,
That is why I can't be with you,
P.S. I still love you,

Girl, I wrote this letter to let you know forever,
I keep you in my heart when I'm leaving you boo,
Girl, I wrote this letter and it ain't getting better,
That is why I can't be with you,
P.S. I still love you.

It would be wonderful if reality is this way..

Well just this for now. About the website, I will open it up today, at 12 midnight. : ) It's empty though. Yeah. Okay, goodbye.

http://bassruler-co.ning.com/

2009-06-21T02:00:00.003+08:00

Soon, http://bassruler-co.ning.com/ will be published and opened up. Alright, any questions?

What is this website thing?
Let's see... Well first of all, it's absolutely a blog, of me. Well not really what I say 'blog'. It's like my whole life in there. Any questions about me, you can ask me there. Just put up a discussion or go in my biodata discussion to ask. In other words, it's the website, to know me better.

Why do you make such website?
First, it's because I'm much interested in those kinds. Second, 'cause it have 'facebook' way of chat. And third, people can easily ask about me, and they can also enjoy the website by it's games and the advertise stuff that I put in there. Or not maybe they won't..

What else do you want to say about this website?
Hmm, I don't know.. Oh yeah, I forgot to say. It isn't open yet. It's still under maintenance. It's open maybe on Monday, or maybe when the new header for my blog is finished. Depends. Right, the content for the website. A lot.. You can post up your own blog, put up your own discussions, play the flash games that I have uploaded, you can put your pictures, your videos, and whatever else. Simpler said, it's like friendster/myspace plus facebook, with extra contents. :p Okay, I don't really know how to say it. Wahaha.

Well that'll be it for now. For more information, you can contact.... Okay there's actually no one you can contact. Just wait for it to be published. :)

Sorry for inactivity.

2009-06-19T19:19:00.004+08:00

Hey. It's been three days that I haven't blog. Day one, I was too busy online-ing whole day. Day two, I didn't go online at all. I was just editing videos and do what I list up on my To Do List. Day three, I was working on this Ning website that I made, which I will publish soon.

Today, I went to the beach, again. But this time, with only my sister. As I told you in my last post, she always wanted to jog. And I, too want to jog. To increase my stamina, and also my quickness. Just being prepared before I'm ambushed by those who hates me. Anyways, here are the pictures.

The sun.

Sun and the reflection.

If I have a long claw, I'd look like 'Wolverine'.

Okay, the tree is still here. But it's getting lower.

Woo, the clouds are gathering. This is on our way back home.

Currently, I am searching for some poems, just to get some ideas for my new lyric, and also to put it up on the header. Yeap, new header is coming! And one of it will be a link to the Ning website that I made. Now, this poem, touches my heart. Okay, not whole of it, just one part. :)

Just One.

Just one teardrop in the rain
Just one kiss to ease my pain
Just one whisper in the wind
Will it bring you back again?

Just one phone call I should make
Just one promise that you'd break
Just one more chance to show the truth
Will it lead me back to you?

Just one touch and I was yours
Just one kiss outside my door
Just one love I had for you
Will you never love me too?

Just one dream that this has been
Just one letdown, left me broken
Just one time I wish it were real
Just one chance to show how I feel

Created by: xoWordNerdxo
Obviously that's not a name. Too bad s/he doesn't show his/her identity.
I'd thank him/her. A lot.

Well whoever this WordNerd guy is, thank you very much for sharing this.

Okay, about the last post. The pictures, it's still in my brother's phone. I didn't manage to take it out from his phone, so.. Just wait. Maybe tomorrow, or the next day. Or some other day. I'll try to get it tonight.

I end this right now. Good bye.

Yesterday.

2009-06-16T13:08:00.004+08:00

Ones with different kind of posing.

Me, my brother, and my sister went to the beach yesterday. For what? Obviously, to stay healthy, goin' for a jog. But, I didn't even sweat..

Proof that I didn't sweat. This is after jog.

My sister actually wanted to go to the beach a long time ago, but since I'm busy with school, and my brother too, plus, she's far too scared to go alone 'cause there are dogs and monkeys on the way, so she's not going. That is, until yesterday.

Woohoo! Surfin'! Not..

As for my brother, I don't know about him. He's kinda been out many times, I guess.. 'Cause he's at Brunei Darussalam University with his friends last two months. He even celebrate almost everything with them. So yeah..

If there's a girl, I would hold her up just like Titanic. :D

Well, as for me, I always do want to go to the beach again. Always.. That where it's the best to confess, to wish, and to shout. The best place for emos to. Okay maybe the second best place.. The first one is the corner of the room..

Just before going back home.

There are actually some pictures, but this time I didn't actually hold on to the camera. So, it's not me who take the pictures. It's my brother and sister. I'll post the pictures some other day, 'cause the extension for the memory card is at my sister's room, and she's off shopping, or maybe with her friends. I don't know.. I was sleeping..

At the beach, as I reach the destination, I wrote your name on the sand, and watch as the sea erases what I have written. And as the sea erases what I have written, I shouted your name, three times. As hard as I could. I shouted, and yet not even a soul hears me. Then, I walked 100 steps with one wish set on my mind, and started to run. I run, and keep on running. Running, as fast as I could, not even a glare, at the back..

I have reached my way back. And there I stand, alone, where the sea almost touched me. There I stand, watching the sun's reflection. There I stand, where wind blows me. And there I stand, wishing of a wish that is very impossible to be a reality. There, I speak. Speak with a hope that it reaches your dreams..

After everything, I turn around through my right. Step by step, the past keeps going in my mind. And step by step, tears flow, from my left eye, through my cheek, and finally, falls to the ground, and the sadness, infects the beach. It is where I hope.. It is where I dreamt.. Of you..

Quote: From the heart - d'sb

Nightwish.

2009-06-15T09:44:00.005+08:00

I recently am listening to some Nightwish's songs, especially Tenth Man Down, and the remix. It rocks. Here's the video live out of it. I promise that you won't like it.

Today I killed, he was just a boy,
Eight before him, I knew them all,
In the fields a dying oath:
I'd kill them all to save my own,

Cut me free, Bleed with me, Oh no,
One by one, We will fall, down down,
Pull the plug, End the pain, Run'n fight for life,
Hold on tight, this ain't my fight,

Deliver me from this war,
Its not for me it's because of you,
Devils instant my eternity,
Obey to kill to save yourself,

Cut me free, Bleed with me, Oh no,
One by one, We will fall, down down,
Pull the plug, End the pain, Run'n fight for life,
Hold on tight, this ain't my fight,

"I envy the 9 lives that gave me hell,
My path made up by their torn bodies,
Man to man, soldier to soldier, dust to dust,
Call me a coward but I cant take it anymore,"

They wait for me far back home,
The live with eyes turned away,
They were the first ones to see,
They are the last ones to bleed,

"The ultimate high as all beautiful dies,
A rulers tool, a priests excuse, a tyrants delight...
I alone, the great white hunter,
I'll march till the dawn brings me rest,
10th patriot at the gallows pole!"

Cut me free, Bleed with me, Oh no,
One by one, We will fall, down down,
Pull the plug, End the pain, Run'n fight for life,
Hold on tight, this aint my fight,

Cut me free, Bleed with me, Oh no,
One by one, We will fall, down down,
Pull the plug, End the pain, Run'n fight for life,
Hold on tight, this aint my fight..

Though, I'm not into heavy metal stuff, but this is somehow different than the others. And this is my first favorite of this type of song. Well, just that.

The past again..

2009-06-13T14:48:00.011+08:00

Cold, in my sleeping room.. I can't believe it that I felt alive once. And instantly feels full of pain, now that you just can't accept anything of me anymore. If truth is what you want, then you would have to feel the pain that I have felt too. And you would have to understand why I did it..

For such a sweet, smart girl, like you. Have you ever think, why is it that I told the truth, that night? I could just keep on lying, and at the end, I would just disappear, gone.. As simple as that.

Do you remember, the night that I laughed devilishly, when I showed you my ugly face, and when I told you the truth, and then there's something about self-punishment, which you say it is a lie? Do you remember that?

I am, forcing myself, in any chance that I got. In the morning of weekend, I usually went to the nearby beach, secretly, to run, to follow the wind. Wishing that it would bring me to you. At school, when we were asked, to do some punishment after the wrongs we did, I did it twice as what the teacher asked.

You think that I'm just fine all the time? Those pictures that I posted in my blog, those happy faces of me, do you think I really am enjoying my life? Hey, that's a fake smile.. Just a fake smile, it doesn't mean anything.. Want to know how my real smiles go? I smile widely, that you would even see my front teeth..

You asked, why did I do this.. Why did I lied.. I was too scared. Too scared that I'd lose you after all those conversations we've gone through. What I answered, was that because I love you. And what did you say? You say that if I love you, I wouldn't lie. That obviously, is true. I feel sadly mad, after showing my face, I got depressed, and my brain turns to an idiot. I can't think.. I was so shocked, that I can't even think of anything..

I'd say.. That the song from the famous techno artist, the Basshunter, now you're gone, really represents my condition right now..

Now you're gone, I realized my love for you was strong..
And I missed you here now you're gone..

Is this the way it's meant to be?
Only dreaming that you're missing me,
And I'm waiting here at home,
I'll be crazy now you're gone..

There's an empty place in my heart,
It won't alarm me, it'll break apart,
it won't heal, it never fades away,
I'll be thinking 'bout you everyday..

And what I fear the most, is that, 'Don't want be your friend' by Dominique Van Hulst, represents her..

It's me.. And it's what I fear.. Myself.. Myself...

PS: I said 'sleeping room', that was wrong. It should be bedroom. But, what the heck, I don't want to start it over again. Sorry that I speak so slowly, it's 'cause it's so cold that I hardly breath. And if I lower it down, it would be hot.. So yeah..

Talkin'

2009-06-10T13:44:00.003+08:00

Hey, di'soulless beat speaking. How are you guys? Well whatever condition you're in, I just hope everything going fine.

Well, today I guess I'll skip the writings and just 'talk' for blogging. Actually I'm doing this, in the morning. Yes, in the morning. And it's Wednesday. In other words, I'm not going to school for today. 'Cause there are severals boring subject today. Plus, I was planning to make a solo performance video. :)

Right now, I'm alone in the living room, just finished with the recordings. Whew, I'm tired of all those shufflings, and actings. Hahaha.. If you're wondering how I'm doin', I guess I could say I'm just fine, but it's not like I'm okay every time. There's a moment of sadness too, especially in the morning right after I woke up from my dreams.

Yes, the dreams are just distracting me, haunting me, what makes me just regrets it. I'm not saying that I hate to dream, I just don't think I should dream about those pasts, which makes me regrets.

Hmm, you know what, just continue this topic some other times. I actually have something else to do, such as continue working on the my desktop background, and editing that video I just recorded. Well, good bye. I hope you have great life, not like mine. Boring.. Goodbye.

PS: Me and my bad pronunciation. :p Sorry about the breathings, and I'm guessing that my 'S' were too long. Whatever. :p

Tonight.

2009-06-08T22:55:00.003+08:00

I had dinner with my family. Yes, my whole family. Except the oldest one, I think he's working, or maybe taking care of the baby. I look around and my brothers and sister, puts a smile, which I don't know why. It made the dinner so lively for tonight. So I'm just forgetting everything for tonight, and just enjoy it with what I usually do when I'm having a good mood.

After dinner, I have homeworks to do and then I have to clean up my laptop. Okay, I've done cleaning up my laptop. So now it's homework. HISTORY! I totally forgot about it. I just keep doing it. And without noticing, it's 10 PM! What I usually do, at 10PM, is to fill up my stomach before I went to bed. And that's what I do. But I'm not going to bed, yet. The picture.

Do you see what I mean by those to fill up my stomach? Of course you do! Now what's the picture of my desktop? It's a white fox, laying on the snow. I just love it when they get pictures out of it. And yes, I love fox. It's one of my favorite animals. Now, zoom in to the foods and drinks!

Okay it's Hot Chocolate, and Peanut Biscuits. It's so good that I wanted more. But those are the last of it. :P While eating those, I do my homework. And I just love to do it this way. Too bad I don't do this everyday.. Well if I do this everyday, I'd even get tired of it.

Okay, I'm done with my history homeworks. Hmm, not really, but I don't feel confidence on the answer so I'll just ask my friend tomorrow at school. Now, I'm going to bed. But before I'm going to bed, let me tell you what I do..

~~Shittin~~'! :P Okay actually, I always go to the bathroom before I go to sleep. Just to check on my bladder. :) Well, just that for tonight. Good night!

I...

2009-06-08T16:08:00.004+08:00

I have realized, that I can no longer finish some lyrics. I lose the confidence. Do you remember this one..?

Untitled of d'sb

Heating the coldness on my body,
I just can't let the fears stay, with me,
Shouting, and forcing my self, to go through!

Scared of what have happened, to me,
Running from the fears that I, kept in me,
Suffering, bleeding, of what I did!

Regretting of those things that made me,
Tried so hard, but failed!
Regretting of those things that kept me,
Go and never stopped!

There's no improvement since that I publish it. Whenever I repeat this song, I'll go and repeat it again and again.. And again.. And again. And that ends in almost two hours. Obviously, it's because I'm so depressed to think.

But this time, I don't need to think. All I do is just write what my sorrow heart says. It sings, without a single melody, without a tone, to lead it from the start, until the end. Which I really call it, 100% pure, true expression.

The Past of d'sb

There's something in my head...
That just won't make me forget..
About everything that I have been through.. Hmm..

I remember that we had... Those..
Conversation, about our hates... And,
The fate that we've gone... Through..

And so I realize, that, yesterday...
Is an emotional day for me..!
Me.... 'Cause,

I started to remember the things,
That I used to say to you!
My past keeps reminding everything,
It feels like, there's someone, here with me,
But who? Could it be..?
Who...? Wo oh..

That'd be the short version. And while writing this, something different, which the melody I heard was from my friend's, I seem to be attracted to it, and make a sound of it..

Staring... At the wing..
That, you have,
and, the wind that..
You're blowing...
Through the white wing..

There's a lot of '-ing'.. But it's a good start. Godly rhymes.. ~~Fuck~~ this, skip it. The point that I'm trying to get into, is that I'm never going to finish a song with this sharp depressing disappointment that I'm having right now. When, how, why it ends? I'll never know.. 'Cause it's just so deep. So deep that you can't even imagine.

Just end this now, I need to finish the new product before the next week. The new Desktop Background V4. Maybe I will post it, or maybe not. 'Cause it's just way too personal. I mean the pictures.

Well, end that.

I realized..

2009-06-07T19:07:00.003+08:00

Yesterday, I was thinking, what would I be in the morning. And I expect myself to once again daze like I did on Friday. Unfortunately, things just went as I expected. I woke up at nine, and just sits there, almost a hour. And without me noticing, I fall asleep, woke up again at 11. Obviously, if this keeps going, I'm going t'be crazy..

Well thanks a lot past. For sharing that piece of ~~shit~~. It's so ~~fuckin~~' awesome that I'm goin' to lose all the concentration in school. I just hope I won't fail my big exam. 'Cause this year is the last exam, and there's no repeat, and re-exam. So if I fail this, then my whole life fails. And if that happens, I would be slacking at home, doing chores, and maybe work as farmer and fisherman. Better than nothing.

I don't have anything else to say. So I'm goin' out watching the night sky. I'll post up the pictures, if I do get some.

Yesterday. Friday, June 5th.

2009-06-06T17:38:00.003+08:00

Yesterday. Midnight, I was awake. 'Cause I slept early the day before, which was around 5, and I woke up at 1. 4AM, I felt something which makes me daydreaming about someone, who I once loved. Something which kept me remembering her, and what she did. Something.. My mind..

I looked out about 20 minutes, and by that time I should be busy doing stuff on my laptop, just to waste my time. But I'm not yet in the mood of it. What I am doing, is just thinking of her. Something, that made me think of her is my mind. My own self. My past self, that I have left.

And that myself which spoke of, came back again. From the dreams, that I just woke up from. From the midnight hours, that I had gone through. The cold night, me, darkness, and tears running down my face, which is invisible. Much invisible, than her's.

Everything I did, everywhere I went.. That past just keep coming back. It's like I'm hearing a story, from the other me, which just keep reminding me of her, and her perfection, her everything..

I end this post, with a picture I took, before had my Friday prayer. Good bye.

June 3rd 2009.

2009-06-03T17:34:00.003+08:00

Hey. I just got home from school. Okay, not really.. But I did around 3PM. And this is what I take before school.

I was getting ready for school, and as I looked outside, it's darker than what I ever see. I never really moves the curtain in the morning. I did, but not this early! Maybe I looked a little weird looking outside.. Hey look here! :p

"What do you want?" Haha. Okay it's a little brighter and blur on the second picture, 'cause I did some editing. Just so you don't believe it, look at these picture. I took it after school.

Okay, this is how bright it is, in the afternoon. And no, I didn't edit this one. It's original. What I edit, is the frames ONLY. So, you can see the difference of it. I didn't take any pictures at school on extra class, 'cause my teacher gives us some exercises. So I don't really have the time to take a picture.

Well, just that boring content for today. And my status right now..

Laying on bed, sleepy.

Well, goodbye.

Hmm.. Yeah..

2009-06-03T03:44:00.002+08:00

Hey. I haven't post anything for two days. Sorry, but I was having a nice rest from school. Since it's ABDB's birthday. To tell you the truth, I really hate my class this year. It's much noisier than the other years! I'd say this year, SMSO 3B, is just plain 3 times BISING! If only I can talk to the principal and made a suggestion, then I would just have a nice and smooth learning, and revising..

Well.. ~~Fuck~~ that. Some asks me why did I change my name to "di'soulless beat". I actually change it because..

di-breakup isn't me now, 'cause I'm going single forever. None the gay either.
I have words in my lifes' theme.. And this time, it's.. "The beat of my life.. Isn't alive.. By that I called myself.. The Soulless Beat.."
'di', in english, almost sounds the same as 'the', so I change it, 'cause my nickname is di, Diddy.
I just feel soulless.. Everytime I go somewhere, I feel weak. I don't feel like talking, and hanging around.
Beat.. Where did I get that idea.. Seriously.. Okay, I suppose it's because I hear a lot of beats than other stuff nowadays.

Five boring reasons of why did I change my name..

I recently am back active with my facebook life. But not all of them.. I just played Restaurant City, and Rock Legend.. Quite boring, but still. I'd say the game is okay. Other than those facebook games, I also play AuditionSEA. A dance game. It's really forcing me to press faster and correctly.. And really is a nice game! Nice peoples too. :)

Well, I don't really have much more things to say. I'll just blog some other time. Maybe this afternoon, after extra class. Goodbye!

How to do the Tuous by 'bassruler.

2009-05-31T17:57:00.004+08:00

Rose through Paint.NET.

2009-05-31T14:16:00.002+08:00

This is 'bassruler. production. The first rose I ever made through picture making and editing software. I'd never thought I would made it, but I did it. Woohoo!! I'm so good at this! Perasan..

May 30th Lunch.

2009-05-30T06:00:00.000+08:00

Hey. Okay I was suppose to post this up after I have my lunch. But since that I was busy watching and downloading some funny movies, so I end up posting it now. Here it is.

This picture is taken after I ate my fried noodles which was bought from my school. I'm not the one who bought it though, my friend did. He brought 10 dollars to school, and showed it to me and my friends. Then my friend said, bah belanja tak, and he did. :p Tutak is what we call him, 'cause he's the shortest in the class. Very, very short. But his real name is actually Awangku Muhammad Zulfadhli. Thanks bro. :D

Okay that was Pepsi. Which is too bought by Tutak's money. :) Thanks again bro.

Since that I felt hot that day, I have to drink a lot of water.

And that's just what I have for my lunch. Pepsi, cold water, and also Fried noodles plus the home made chicken wing. Hehe. What a great life.. Not. Well, just that for today. Good bye.

'bassruler. can solve Rubix Cube.

2009-05-29T20:35:00.001+08:00

Just made a boring video out of a boring life.

I ate the apple.

2009-05-28T19:11:00.002+08:00

The apple. Clear red, fresh, cool, sweet apple. One of the favorite..

Sorry..

2009-05-27T19:34:00.002+08:00

I'm sorry.. I don't mean to ignore that pretty face of yours today.. Blame my small sighting left eye, not me. I take you as a total stranger, who I don't want to look at, who I don't want to fall for. I'm sorry to be that way. So please, don't just ignore me just like I ignore you. You know me better than anyone else, so you should know why I did it..

Here's the skin!

2009-05-26T22:35:00.003+08:00

Hey. Okay, I just finish this skin around 10PM. Since I'm bored, so I just edit up the codes for tonight and here it is! Yeah, it's still plain, but at least it's not so lagging than the last time. Last time was much of breakups. Now, it's the eye.

Believe it or not, my left eye is normal, but the sight of it is like always fade away. But ~~Fuck~~ The What? It's just the left! No way this is just a usual stuff. It's been two weeks. Shouldn't my eye be normal now? Besides that, it just started randomly. Once, I was jogging with my friend on PE period, then my eye is just fading and I have to take off my spectacle and close my left eye.. I'm too afraid to let it open. I'm afraid it's because of the sensitivity to the heat. That's just what my brain is thinking..

I soon am going to change the URL from 'http://di-breakup.blogspot.com/' to 'http://disoulless-life.blogspot.com/'. I'll change it on Friday, or Thursday. Don't worry if you typed it wrong, 'cause http://di-breakup.blogspot.com/ will be the notice of which that I have moved to the other URL. So that you'll know.

I actually have two 300 words of compositions to do, so I'll be off. Later.

New skin almost finished!

2009-05-25T22:13:00.004+08:00

Hey. I'm not going to blog much for today. Just telling you guys that I found the perfect skin, and I need the header to be perfect. So it's still in the process of creating-editing. Maybe it'll be published in Wednesday. If it's not Wednesday, then it might be Thursday or Friday. So yeah. Well just this short one as notice. Talk t'ya later.

How to do the Sider by 'bassruler.

2009-05-25T22:09:00.000+08:00

17 Again.

2009-05-24T02:16:00.003+08:00

Hey. I just finished watching 17 Again. What a great movie! At least that's what I thought. About watching Hidamari Sketch x 365, it's funny, but I don't really like a random anime. So I just cancel on watching it.

Now, I'm working on the blog skin, making my own pictures so I can put it up. And I guess, for another two months, I'll be changing it again. It can't be every month, 'cause I'm going to be busy. You know, I have a big exam this year after all.

Okay, the video below, about the Long T, many said that I'm 'handal' whatever. Is that so? The easiest skill, and you guys say I'm 'handal'? I'm not a pro guys. I'm just an ordinary person, with high expressions. That all you need, high expressions. If you want the truth of your shuffling, I can tell you. What you need to improve, and what you need to change.

As I said, I'm too busy with stuff, not all about schools though. Such like.. Download movies.. Editing videos. Writing lyrics.. Search programs.. Search fonts.. Blog skin for my blog. Making 'wSiBW' video. That is, when I have the time to use my laptop. 'Cause soon, it'll be a big exam. So I'm enjoying before the stress. I know it should be the opposite, but that's just what I want to do.

About pancaragam, which I told you last time that I'm joining. My friend said it's full, but the good news, there's 8 more spaces. So I sign up for it. Thank goodness! :-) What I'm going to play, is either keyboard, or violin. I guess I'm going to pick violin, 'cause the sound of it is much lovely. That's what I think.. Besides, I already have a keyboard to click. Hehe.

Well, I guess that's just it. Goodbye.

Soon, changing.

2009-05-22T23:51:00.003+08:00

Hey. 12AM here. I remembered the song that I used to listen to, which is Heaven, by Do. Or the one with remix which is by DJ Sammy. I use to love this song, but it just moved away, somehow..

I just finished with the video 'How to do the Long T.' It's on the post below. It took me days to finish 'How to do some of the 'bassruler.'s skills.', cause it's too lag to continue. So I just make one video for one skill.

I just finished watching Anime called True Tears about 5 hours ago. I watched it from episode 1, to 13, which is the end. Continuously.. And it's like 7 hours. Or maybe more than that.. And the next one, maybe I'll watch it tomorrow. It's called, Hidamari Sketch x 365..

Soon, I'll be changing my blog skin. Just searching for the right one.. I can't seem to find the one that I like. There's one, but it's too girlish. Maybe I'll soon change my URL too. And so is the content of what I share in my blog. Just maybe..

Mmm.. What else do I want to share.. Hmm.. Just that I guess.. For now. Bye.

How to do the Long T by 'bassruler.

2009-05-22T23:46:00.002+08:00

Desktop.

2009-05-21T00:47:00.004+08:00

Hey. It's 1AM, and yes, I'm still awake. Wide awake. Since that I'm just bored of creating videos, so I'm going to stop and continue it tomorrow. Now, I actually don't have anything to share, but I guess I could share my desktop. Here's a pic.

Left side and the bottom right side is just to put it the icons. And the right side where you see the texts, but of course just by looking at it, you won't able to read it so here's the text.

Big font, with dark gray text.
Forcing, loser, awake, freak, stupid, failed, cold, insomnia, soulless, liar, scream, regrets, broken.

Big font, with white text.
Bleed, suffer, haunted, crying, sick, sad, fool, hate, why?, scared, fear, scars.

Small font, with light gray text.
I know I made mistakes.
So I beg for forgiveness.
I'm the one to be blamed.
What I did was wrong.
And I regret of doing it.
Thousands of sorries.
That I made you cry..
That I made you sad..
And that I made you mad.
I know I lied.
But it just go and never stops.
And when I try to confess.
I'm just scared of losing you.
And it's just hard to say those words.
Now, you said it's too late.
Now, you never trust me.
Because I lied, a lot.
By the time we know each other.
Until March..
We never spoke after then.
Became of what I feared of.
Losing you. I cried.
Cried for you..

Lowest part of desktop (hidden over the start bar).
I WILL NEVER STOP TRYING TO GET MY AIM. IF I FAIL, I WILL TRY AGAIN UNTIL I GET IT.

If you want to take a look at the original, click here. If you want to use it, go ahead. I don't mind. Just edit the center. But first, you have to download the 'Evanescent' font. Click here to download the font. Incase you don't know where to put the font, go to Start > Control Panel > Fonts. Just put it in there. Use either Paint.NET or Adobe Photoshop to edit.

Why did I change my desktop, because of 3 reasons.
1. I'm bored with the last one.
2. I feel the way I felt the last time.
3. I just have a lot of time to spend.

Just that, for now. Good bye. I'll go to bed now.

'bassruler. walks alone.

2009-05-20T00:26:00.002+08:00

Since that youtube is too careful with the law, so this video which I upload in youtube have been muted for fucking whatever reasons. At least it still works on metacafe. YAY METACAFE!!

WATCH IT UNTIL IT'S OVER.
Do read the credits. :) Just so that everyone would do whatever what the videos have written.

May 19th, a long stay-back.

2009-05-19T20:34:00.005+08:00

Hey. I had my Islamic Religion Knowledge extra class today. It was fun, because he is one of the panat-est teacher that teaches me. We actually have this IRK from 2PM to 3PM, but since that most of the class votes it to be from 1PM to 2PM, so it changes.

Bla bla bla, about the extra class. After the extra class, I open up my laptop and let my friend play Counter Strike, since that it was a long time that he doesn't play it, so I gave him some chance. Besides, he's my little bro. Or is it..? Yes, but not the same blood.

Now, after all that happens, I and my older brother who stay-back just to hangout with his friends, should go home. But since my father had a meeting of whatever in the school, and my mother was out to her school, my two brothers were working.. So we have to be patient and just wait. There's only one car left, of which it is a manual drive. Who's home? My second oldest brother, and also my sister, who hardly drives manual cars..

Bla bla bla.. So we have to wait, until the meeting is over!! Seconds, minutes, hours.. Well actually, to be exact it's a hour and 49 minutes. And you know what? The school is a total silence!! Look at these pictures.

Okay, the first one is just for views. And the last one, there's a car. Whose is it? It's the school security's. It's gone when it's like almost 4:30. I'm feeling that it's not enough proves to show. So I'll post some pictures that my brother had taken with his phone. Not now, but maybe later, tomorrow or some other day.

Well, end this. Oops, I forgot to mention..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FATHER!!
MAY ALL YOUR WISH COME TRUE!
How old was it again? :)

Well, end this now.

May 18th, Science extraclass.

2009-05-18T20:25:00.004+08:00

[Drag the picture to the tab for closer view.]

Hey. Today, I had my science extra class which is my favorite subject. I don't know why, but it just is. As you see the picture above, it's from the back of the SMSO Lab Science 3. And it's actually the second time that we use projector for Science extra class. The first one failed.

Okay, that is the boy who concentrate so much when he's in an extra class. But not really when in school period. His name is Najib, and what we call him, Ketua Kampong! Because his father is the Head Village of Bukit Beruang. :-) And who's that at the back? The one who looks here is Ramzi, the short one is Awangku Zulfadhli, and the one at the side is Fadzul. And the girl there with red hood is Siti Atikah.

Oh look, who's that good looking guy over there? Haha. That's our Science Teacher, Sir Alimin. Let's see, who's that on the back.. Okay, Balqis and... Oh right, Rabiatul! Hehe. Almost forgot. And the one who's looking at them is Awangku Syazwan. The geek of the class. :P

There's actually more of my friends, but they are too shy to show their faces. And some is just far away from my sight. They are, Khairul Amirin, Khairi Akmal, Adi Izatti, Hong Jun Hong, Fiona, and... Uh.. Nur Atikah I guess. Yes, same name, different person.

Well I just had fun learning and hanging out with my friends. And I manage to force myself at jogging on Physical Education for today. And I even use my PE uniform after PE, which isn't suppose to be that way. Who cares. Hehe.

Today, it's much than I expect it to be. I wish I could say that I'm happy, but I'm just not. The truth, in extra class, I didn't do much of rewind to my past year topics. I'm much of a nothing minded when it comes to extra class. 'Cause you know, I'm just depressed about things. Well end this.

Dream.

2009-05-16T19:12:00.005+08:00

I saw you in the dream. You who I love once. My heart starts missing, of who you are. Of what I saw in my dreams, that you are watching TV, laying on a sofa.. Hanging out with your friends, talking and laughing.. And enjoying your own life. While I am forgotten.

This heart is once again broken. I'm turning soulless. Suffering, crying the blood of my heart, because some part of it have run away. I just don't understand myself. How can I trust anyone else, when I can't even trust myself. I'll have to go alone, until I know who I am.

So much for a dream.. Makes me remember the painful past. Before this dream, I saw the word that my friend wrote, and it's the same as what she left me. Maybe that is the cause of which I get the dream..

I wish I'll just get an amnesia. Forget about everything and continue my awful life..

Great, great.

2009-05-15T05:54:00.008+08:00

Hey. Okay, as you have see on the below post, the video on How to be a pro in shuffling. I know it's quite useless, but that is how I become a great shuffler. I observe their moves, I practice with a strong will of being a great shuffler. Of course, this only works to those who really really wants to be a legend in shuffling. Remember this phrase, The movements doesn't really matter. What actually matters is the way you express through shuffling.

What pro? What legend? I disagree that there is no pro in shuffling. There is. A pro, it's when the person moves to make it look much 'harder', but actually it's easy. The first one who I call a pro is the one in Australia, a pure Melbourne Shuffler. Whoever he is, I forgot his name.. As for legend, it's a pro, of which they have quitted and no longer shuffle. By quitting as in legend, I mean by injury or diseases. Not 'quitting' just like that.

Guys in Brunei Shuffle website, I know that video sucks bad, wasting your two minutes of your whole life. But I'm just doing it so that the newbies who asked me 'How do you become that good in shuffling?' many times, to stop asking me the same question every time they meet me. I don't like to be 'interviewed' in public.

To the guys who hate that video, I know it's useless, but it's quite meaningful for the newbies, 'cause they just don't understand how to be good. They actually don't need a 'teacher'. They just need their selves! Have you heard Don't trust anyone so quick? I'm asking you not to trust those who teaches you in shuffling. Observe the videos, and go practice yourself. And when you are all by yourself, you will be much comfortable, and you won't be shy of any bloopers that you have done. But if you're much better off with a friend to teach you, that'll be just fine. But I myself even practice myself. Who teaches me, an online friend which is through his videos, and through the tutorial videos.

Whatever, end this.

This video is telling you the truth.

You who hates this video..

Means you hate the truth.

How to be a pro in shuffling.

2009-05-15T05:02:00.002+08:00

I got your letter..

2009-05-13T16:38:00.003+08:00

I got your letter..

A little of everything.

So, it's her. I was mistaken the last time. Today, I actually meet her at the canteen after school. She asked me something of what we people should be straight forward of. I would accept, but I'm too cruel for you. Not just you, yet for everyone. I never want to fall again, the reason of which that I talk to girls by looking away from them. I don't want to see, their beautiful expressions, their emotions.

I know, that it's just too much, but I'm the one who fall easily, which makes me force myself from looking at those precious pretty faces. Except for one type of girl. Which the hair is short, and by short I mean the type of guy's hair. You know why? 'Cause they think like a guy, act like a guy, and whatever like a guy. Hmph.

But there's a time that I have to look at their faces, what do I have to do? Just look at them, and after a blink, quickly look away. And if I can't, I'll just have to turn around. Some might say that I only care about the outside. No, it's just that.. Beauty, it attracts guys, same as a bee attracted to flowers. What our heart see of the real beauty, is what makes us curious about someone. But if you never see the beauty, you will never have to fall in love.

What is love in first sight? How do you know that it is love in first sight? Our heart, contacted our eyes, and the eyes makes our whole body not moving or temporarily paralyze. Until, we were awaken by someone or something. Why temporarily paralyze? Because the eyes shows that she who we saw just now, is the most beautiful thing you ever seen.

What about true love? True love.. Every love is just so crazy. True love is when their love almost died, but it just recovers with both powers within a short time. And after that, it just go on as forever. Is it? Or isn't it? That doesn't matter, it's what I think of, not you.

I'm going crazy. She speaks for the second time, and smile for the first time, at me. She who I secretly, pure hidden, admire. I feel like lying to myself. I thought I promise myself not to fall once again. But it seems I failed. The punisher, soon.. I'll be ready.

End. The she of above, and the she who I just spoke of, are different persons. Why won't I just write their names? Because if I mention their names, my friends who read this will know about it and it might spread to whole of my class. Being careful.

The latest pictures!

2009-05-12T17:12:00.003+08:00

Hey. Okay I know I've been posting pictures for the last two posts, and this is the third. The reason is that I don't have much time for editing last time. But now, I guess I'm free. So that's why I've been posting my past weeks pictures right now. And even the last few days. But this is the last one. It really is. After this, it won't be pictures. It'll be videos. But that's going to take a while, cause I'm new with editing videos. So excuse me. :-) Well, here goes the picture! Bla bla bla..

That's just it. And this was taken yesterday, and my nickname on MSN was.. 'Chillax; apple. [S15+]'. Many asked, "Hey, what's up with your nickname? Apple? Haha." What so funny about apple that is mentioned in a nickname? Okay, why apple? The picture is the reason. Take a good look at it.

Yeah, I ate an apple at that time. And you know what's the other reason? Because apple is my third favorite fruit. Which Mango is the first, and Coconut comes second. Well that's not important, and you don't even care. Mmhmm. So this ends now, maybe I'll be sharing something else later in the night. See ya.

More and more pictures.

2009-05-11T15:45:00.003+08:00

Hey. Pictures again for today. And after pictures, it will be videos. Shuffle of course! What else could it be? There is this one thing, it's quite different of which that I tell the newbies in shuffle, how to be a pro. :P Today, coming ups..

These pictures are the last pictures that I ever taken before I cut my hair to short and a little standing. The short hair pictures will be the next post, or maybe tomorrow. Let's just see. Tomorrow.

Okay, here goes the pictures! Pictures..

School shirt - Thursday, and Saturday.

That's it for now. More tomorrow or some other days. Good bye!

Past pictures.

2009-05-10T17:35:00.003+08:00

Hey. Okay I'm suppose to post this up a long long long and more 'long' time ago. But since I can't find the font, so I just have to use another font. Here it is! And here, this is where I'll tell you guys the 2L1S. I hope you're happy, you who asked me to do so. Pictures..

IN THE MORNING
[BEFORE SCHOOL]

AFTER SCHOOL
[THE 2L 1S]

COVERAGE

[BEFORE / AFTER]

Last time, I did tell you that I want to change my hairstyle. I'm turning to messy way. But since that my friend hate it so much that he makes my hair turn that emo way again, so I decide to cut it and turn it to spiky and short. I tried to make it spiky and stand, but my hair only fits to going down.. *2 thumbs down*. Okay, the last picture!

Mmhmm. Yeapp. Actually I took more pictures today, but I'll post it later. By later, I mean as soon as I can. 'Cause I'm pretty slow on editing, I want too much perfection on pictures. I wonder why..? More of pictures..

Well, that's just it for now. Soon, it'll be Maghrib, so I'll just be online on my MSN, and do my homework. So whoever wants to chat with me just add me up at asri.147@hotmail.com, and talk to me. Talk about whatever you want. :) Okay, goodbye! End.

A new beginning.

2009-05-09T13:48:00.003+08:00

Hey there. Well today, it's much than I expect it to be. I expect myself to sit around just being alone, you know, being emo and all. When I arrived at school, I just make that boring and weak face, and started to think that I have to stop this soon, 'cause I'm not an emo, I'm just a sensitive guy. Soon, quitting being that damn emo and just be this me who is so damn ugly. New hair cut next week!

I started to make videos, but it's not done with it's editing. To be exact, I didn't even start on the edit, 'cause I just can't find the fonts that I used last time. I can't seem to remember what the name was. Same with the pictures that I took. I can't even find the fonts for it. Oh great!! Just wonderfully great! The galleries..

I decide to get in Pancaragam. Which you can say it's somewhat like Orchestra. 'Cause you know, this might be the chance for myself to be that musician that I so long ever wanted. Taking the lesson is the least I should do. Soon, when I start working, I will buy that 'music instrument', and try my best to make a song. I'm keeping what I wanted to play as a secret for now. Soon, I'll tell you guys. Musician..

I'm thinking of 'Word of the day'.. 'Black spray'. Hehe. I so need it for my shoes right now. How about wax? That's good too, but spray is better. :P The word of the day, BLACK SPRAY.

There's no more planning of meetup shuffle in my school, 'cause my friend's speaker have a little problem, and is on it's way for repair. Though, there's a lot of new shuffle songs that I have downloaded nowadays. So it'll be a suprise when there's a meetup. Hehe.. No meetup due to speaker..

I have watched Dragon Ball Evolution, and it's SO NOT ORIGINAL. Quite an interesting story, but NOT ORIGINAL! Why? Because it's not Japanese who the actor is. The least should be the writer or director who is Japanese. I'm now about to watch Uninvited. I'm guessing that it's a scary movie. Or not.. Movies..

I'm quite active with community websites now, such as Friendster, and Facebook. But the most active is MSN, and Friendster. Facebook is laggy for me to open, so it's quite hated. Online.

Okay, I know I talk about a random stuff in blogging, but that's what people wants if it's video. A random, real life, natural, craziness and add up a little funny stuff. That'll work if you are making your own video for the whole world. Random.

Well, just that for now. Goodbye! :-)

Oops..

2009-05-08T01:39:00.002+08:00

Hey. Okay, I'm suppose to blog in the afternoon, but since that I was busy downloading plugins for Paint.NET, so it moved until now. After I finished downloading those plugins, I edited the pictures and forgot one more thing. The text font. That's what I'm missing! So I go and search the whole free font download. And I just finished a few. But I can't seem to find the main font that I use. So the pictures will have to wait. Forgot..

As I said before that our desktop computer, or PC in short, have some kind of problems. And now, it won't even show a bit on the monitor. And problems is in that CPU, and also that monitor. What I am confused with is when the CPU works, the monitor doesn't. And same the other way around. Which is kind of a hated thing. Oh well, at least I have my laptop back. : ) PC problems.

As for the lyrics, no improvements. I was thinking for the whole 2 hours, yet not even a single idea came into my brain. It needed at least 5 more paragraphs. And I haven't yet decide which is the chorus. Hmm... True expression..

After dinner, I chat with a school friend of mine which have moved to BSB because of his parents. Not only that we chat, we also put on our webcam. Hehe. And I'm a mess at that time, but who cares? He's a friend anyways.. Then I changed my nickname to "Talk t'me and let's go through webcam." and my online friends just started a conversation, and also put on their webcams. Well the most fun chatting with is the one from Singapore. Funny, and a cute girl. She really made my day. Thanks 'Y'. :-) The chats.

Well that'll be just it for now, 'cause number one, it's late, number two, it's Friday night, and number three, I'm sleepy. Good night! Goodbye.

First time of..

2009-05-07T06:31:00.002+08:00

Hey. Today is the first time that I blogged this early. Well, not the first time if it's no school time. But this is school time! And I have approximately 8 more minutes to go before I go to school. Well, just saying hello, and I hope you have a nice day. :) First time of..

The good news, and the bad news.

2009-05-06T21:09:00.002+08:00

Hey. I have good news, and the bad news. It's good to hear the good news first. Okay, the good news is that my laptop is done with it's repairing, and I am now using it. And the guy who works at that shop says that the virus ate my programs because I didn't gave it something to eat. I'm kidding.. The good news.

The bad news, is that it's being formatted, and added in the programs which are needed, and also unneeded. And another good news is that everything important in my laptop are backup-ed. Especially my Science past year notes that I just made weeks ago. At least that makes my life easier. The bad, and another good news.

Well, just that for now. 'Cause I have a lot of homework to pass up tomorrow. Good bye, good night. And I'll be continuing my work now. Not what you think I am.

Gets worst.

2009-05-06T15:32:00.005+08:00

Hey. What I hear is that my dad is going to Kiulap, to take or maybe just checking out my laptop. And what happens today is that this PC, have some kind of problem which I'm too dumb to think of, that maybe ending my blogging, and other stuff. Or maybe I won't even able to online again for my whole stu-life. By 'stu', I didn't mean 'stupid', what I mean is 'student'. Possibly..

Okay, who's birthday is today? My sister's boyfriend!! Hey, happy birthday! Tua sudah iaa. Hehe. Bila kawin? :P Mudah mudahan happy happy selalu, and panjang umur. Amin, amin. By the way, thanks for sharing a little mint chocolate. :P And also happy birthday to one of my online friends, which she won't be online because she's too busy with her birthday celebratings. Happy birthday to you, and may you have a happy life. :-) The birthdays..

I may have to change the ones that I have completed, because I think it's just nonsense. Didn't you think the same way? Okay let's take a quote out of it.

Heating the coldness on my body,
Throwing all the fears that I, have in me,
Shouting, and screaming, as hard as I could!

Scared of what have happened, to me,
Hiding from the fears that I, felt in me,
Crying, and bleeding, of what I did!!

Look at those bolded ones, it's 'Throwing all the fears that I have in me', then it goes, 'Hiding from the fears that I felt in me'. What kind of nonsense is that? I thought I throw it away, now I'm hiding? How stupid am I? Then there goes the, 'Shouting, and screaming'. Isn't that the same? ~~Fuck~~ you? Now the last one. 'Crying'. Did I really cry? Of course not. Then why the heck did I even put that up if this is a true expression? It's time to make a change! Here it goes..

Heating the coldness on my body,
I just can't let the fears stay, with me,
Shouting, and forcing my self, to go through!

Scared of what have happened, to me,
Running from the fears that I, kept in me,
Suffering, bleeding, of what I did!

Regretting of those things that made me,
Tried so hard, but failed!
Regretting of those things that kept me,
Go and never stopped!

Is that better now? And that happens just right after I blog. Is blogging the source where I get the ideas? Not really. The one who made me notice of the lyrics is the one who I love. Who keeps me thinks of the smiles that we both go through. But that's just it. I only think of the happiness, that I forget it have ended a long long long and more 'long' words, time. The true expression..

I guess that's just it. Well, good bye and I hope you have a great life. More bloggings if the laptop is finish with it's repair.

Memories.

2009-05-05T23:30:00.003+08:00

Hey. Time keeps flowing, and I keep forgetting that I have let everything go. The things that have a sad ending, and have a happiness in the middle, and the strange way of beginning. That's what always going in my head. Which makes me sometimes have a random feelings and face expressions. But mostly, the face expressions stays hard. That's what I wanted. For everyone not to know how I really feel inside. Who cares?

Daydreaming, it comes once again. And the memories, it's all coming back to me. And saying that feels just like I have been in an amnesia. That's what I wish for, to get an amnesia, and never get those memories ever again. And going through that will always be 'first time'. And everyday, it feels like you just born again. The wish..

Many that I have asked to comment on my incomplete lyrics, and many have commented that it's good, great, and one have copy it and try to make the music. What I hope, is that the lyric will be finished, and will be published through my crew itself, the S15+. And some even ask me for some tips on how to make the lyrics. True expressions..

Regret? Don't even mention it when I am right on your face. I know no regrets! Remember, and keep it in your head! The regrets that I had is gone. 'Cause you know, what we regret is in the past. And if there's no past, there's no regrets. What's the use of regret anyways? Is it to make us awake, not to do it again? Such useless things aren't needed. The regrets..

Off, sleeping. Until next time. There's no news of my laptop, so it might be a while.

I'm going short.

2009-05-03T15:46:00.002+08:00

Hey. I'm off with thin-short again. But this time, I will always be. I won't change it, unless I'm free to do so. What I am talking about is my hair. It's getting obvious when I don't wear my songkok around school. And it's getting messy every time there's wind blowing it. And the wind, is always blowing.

I actually plan to go to the beach. But day by day, I just lose those luck. Bad luck, makes bad mood. And bad mood, makes me thinks, rather than watching the beautiful view. Jogging. Yeah, it throws away my stress. But not when I'm in a bad mood. By bad mood, I meant if there's something wrong going on.

Something wrong, is definitely what happens right now. But who cares? No one do. Not you, not me, not even a soul! I wish I could just let go of everything without anyone noticing. Just impossible. Nothing impossible in this world? How about dying for hundred of times? Is that possible? Of course not! A word doesn't describe everything.

After two hours of thinking, all I get is six sentence. If I have that much time to get it finish, it would have completed. But that six sentences are just the introduction. What about others? I guess I really lost the way of thinking seriously. What way am I thinking right now you asked? The positive way to get it over with. The six sentences ladies and gentlemen.

Untitled - S15+

Heating the coldness on my body,
Throwing all the fears that I, have in me,
Shouting, and screaming, as hard as I could!

Scared of what have happened, to me,
Hiding from the fears that I, felt inside of me,
Crying, and bleeding, of what I did!

And emo song, for my own shuffle crew. After those six sentences, it should be something like, 'Regretting of those' bla bla bla.. And something about memories. Definitely, I'm trying to do some huge changes of the lyrics. Yes, that is what I was talking about in my last post. And also this post. Lyrics..

Well, that's all for now. Until next time.

Unfortunate.

2009-05-03T03:41:00.002+08:00

Hey, this is me, writing through my old way. Which is through my PC. I guess you'd understand what I meant by that. Yeah, my laptop, it keeps restarting. ~~Fuck~~ you. It's good that it have guarantee. So, it won't need money to repair or whatever needed.

I'm throwing away everything that I have created my self, and I'm going to remake it. And this time, without haste, without someone to get in it. Without someone else's thoughts, and the other's life. Some, might know what it is that I am talking about right now, and a lot, didn't. What I'm talking about, are filled with words. Expression of the inside.

School makes me very busy nowadays. Everyday, minutes, hours. It never stops, and keeps coming for the biggest exam that I will have ever in my whole life. Or should I say the third biggest. Or maybe more.. People keep forcing their selves to remember what they've learn. But they never tried to understand how, and why. Why force yourselves, to do what you don't want to? Is it that you want to suffer for the future? It's best to understand, rather than forcing yourselves.

Hmm, I think I won't be active on onlining since my laptop have problems. So if I don't post anything for a week, you know what happens to me. Until next time, a week, two weeks, or maybe more.

You shouldn't mention it.

2009-05-01T03:33:00.004+08:00

Will you laugh, and be happy once again, if something bad, really really bad, much worst than you ever imagined, happens in the past? The answer is yes, but once mentioned, you will always be serious. Once you saw a person like you, you will somehow tried to avoid it to happen. You will somehow try to change other people's destiny. Who wouldn't?

Am I being too emotional and sensitive of everything? Because it seems this boring world, is filled with nothing except plain feelings. But since everything gone wrong, I never did feel too emotional. And what I feel is that I shouldn't be in this world. Because nothing fits me right. Just forcing, and pushing it, everything seems too much.

What's the best thing ever happens to me, where was the best place I ever been to, when was the best moment I ever had.. If you asked me those, and I answered. That's just lies, and never been the truth. Because, there's no 'best' in me. The only best of me was the best in being a loser.

'What we wanted to most, is what we won't get. And what we don't want, there's possibilities of getting it.' I never did get what I really wanted. No matter how much I tried. And what I don't want, is to remember the painful past. Don't you ever understand, how I really feel? You do? Then why do you make me remember? The truth, you don't understand!

Do you think that you are all that just because you are my close friend? You're nothing unless you are my best friend! Just friends, are still unforgivable. I can't accept everything. Especially the things that made me feel bad. Is that what friend is for? To make us feel bad? Absolutely not! I should go friend-less rather than being friends with those who makes me out of my control.

'Before you do something, think carefully of what will happens next.' Remember, memorize it, and never get it off your head! If you don't, then I really would go off alone without anyone helping me. Fail or succeed, that's up to me..

Shit.

2009-04-29T19:32:00.003+08:00

Hey. I just learned how to edit videos. But recently, it always got stuck just like that. Especially when I add some video transition. I then just be patience with that stuck-ness. I let it go like that, and continue doing it again, and again.. But then today, I just edit it, and saved it. But, it won't saved as a video. So even if I finish editing it, it will still not finish, because it can't even change to a video! Now, I can't even made a video. Well, at least I finish one..

Okay, today, at school. It was a VERY hot day. Much hotter that I expected. Plus, I have Physical Education on the last period. And we were forced to do 10 sets of running, because my classmate, which I am not close to, is kicking a volley ball off to the field. ~~Fuck~~ you guys.

At home, I took a long shower, getting all those heat in my body. If not, I will get darker than before. After lunch, I do usual stuff with my laptop, and while doing that I started to get sleepy. I was thinking of taking a short nap. But it turns out to be a six hours of sleeping, which it was suppose to be at night.

I got home works to do. Geography, Mathematics, Commercial Studies, and I have to stick my history notes. I hate home works. I prefer doing it after school. But if I go home after school, I prefer using my laptop than doing my home work. Besides, doing my home work at night makes me much refreshed in the early morning.

I can tell that today is a bad day. Starting from the beginning of school, I misstep, and almost fell. Luckily, it just stucked there. The teacher have a bad mood look which I obviously saw it on her face. Break time, I spill my drink. It's good that it's just plain water. And lastly is that PE stuff that I told you earlier.

If you read this around 12:30AM - 1:30AM, I still am awake. Eating some bread, and drinking orange juice. And listening to some random songs. Just waiting for Sony Vegas Pro 8.0 to be fully downloaded. 'Cause I deleted the Movie Maker, by force.

Well, I'm going to continue on with my life. Ends here.

Never ends.

2009-04-28T16:58:00.005+08:00

I know, that this thought will never ends. It makes me sad, and become that person who don't have a feeling, but act as if that person do have one. I laughed, I smiled, and I enjoyed being with those who I am with. But I keep lying, hiding those feelings that I shouldn't be. And what I will get is just words, if I do show it. Just, words.. Never it will be a something that I can do about.

I saw you the next day that I left. I know you're just like me. Hiding, those feelings. But at least you do have feelings. I'm much much feeling-less. I know now that you really do get my point. You usually take a look at me, when you when you pass by. Now you don't. I'm grateful, but I know you're just the same way as I am. That thoughts, it won't end. It's just voices that haunts your everything, makes you think. The thoughts, of the past.

You should know how to handle it better, cause to you, I'm not the first who breaks that vulnerable heart of yours. And I should take much longer time, cause you are the first who break this heart that I have.

But you know, if I really think of it, it's me the one who is to be blamed. I am the one who fell for you. I am the one who wants to give it a try. You rejected because you know that we won't make it. And you are right. But you just accept it right away, just after I said, "Hearts are meant to be broken."

And you know what? I was right. Hearts are meant to be broken.. But, I shouldn't share that word. It's too cruel, and straight forward. And it helps, to think of the positive. Those voices and pictures in your head, are just haunting you. You can just let it in there, and live with it. You can still go on with your life if you think of this 'hearts are meant to be broken' word.

The thoughts of the past, will never ends. Never. Not even once. So, what you should do is just to live on. Just live on, even if it's stabbing you every seconds..

Pictures after extraclass.

2009-04-27T22:26:00.002+08:00

Hey. Today I had Science extra class which starts at 2PM and ends at 3:15PM. Well, it's much different than other extra classes, because our teacher is young which I mean is that he is so cool, and sporting. But there are many complaints of his voice. It's like the softest you ever heard. Well whatever.

When I was doing my work with this two friends of mine, the other friends, wants to watch some funny videos that I collect in this laptop. And then that Science teacher wants to try out the projector through my laptop. And so we did, and it took a long time to work.

3:15PM, I have 15 minutes left to go. I was planning on making a shuffle video at school. To prove that S15+ are schoolies of SMSO. But then I saw my father's car right after I sat down at the bench. Plan failed. At home, I borrow my brother's mobile phone and record my shuffling. Yeah, I manage to make a shuffle video, but I haven't done editing it yet. Maybe next week.

That's just it I guess. Oh, right. The pictures. I almost forgot.

IN THE CAR

HOME

After that last picture was taken, I go for a change and record my shuffle. And then, I do what I always do. And that's just it. Well, goodbye.

Now it's over.

2009-04-26T17:58:00.005+08:00

It's over right? Why do you still care? You said you hated me, and that I'm now the worst enemy that you have. Then why do you ask me, and have that curiosity of what happened to me? So I said, "Don't you remember it's over?" and continue with "Just ignore this 'enemy' of yours and stay away."

You are the causes of everything. And you are the one who ends it. You have the power to do that. Not me. The only thing I do is to be a shield of the pain. To be the one who is blamed. And to be the place to make you happy. Yet, something is wrong, and you're the one to be blamed.

It's over. I fall to deep to you, that I do what you asked me to do. You ask me to change. And you who changes me to this person, I'm throwing that away and changes back to what I was. And I will never be that person ever again. I never will be that person who gave second chance. What I am right now, is only a normal guy, who have his own patience.

Do you remember the promises that we have made? There were hundreds of it. I'm breaking it. All of it. Cause you know, it's over! The fire just blown up the gases. It ends, and never to continue.

You said that I'm a coward. Yes, I am. And what does it makes you? The person who trains me not to be a coward? I AM A COWARD! And I WILL ALWAYS BE! So don't stop me of running away, from everything that I hate. Don't even think about me.

Am I a part of your memory, which can't even break a bit, that makes you always remembers? Forget of everything, that I have done. That crazy things that I did, is to show that I am crazy. Yet, you attracted to me? What, are you liking every crazy guys? Are you stupid?

Silence, breaks through us both. Nothing, no one, is around. Just you and me there at the center of that assembly point. You seem not to have anything more to say, and get the point that I just said. Do you? That's it. I end it with a good bye and a turn, walking through slow steps. Never will go back to the past.

It's over..

Goodbye Brother Azhar.

2009-04-26T16:59:00.003+08:00

My brother went back home yesterday, from UBD. It's been a month that we haven't met. Yes I know that Brunei, the distance is just near. But if you are me, which is a kid without a car nor driving license, then distance is just like from Brunei Darussalam to Australia by using a boat.

Back to the main subject. As I said, my brother just went back home yesterday. And went to Miri this morning, and now he is going back to UBD. And that only happens in less than 24 hours. I want at least one. Not one second, not one minute, and not even one hour. I want at least one day. One hour is enough, but that doesn't reach my satisfaction level. Oh well, what happened, happens.

So..

GOODBYE BROTHER.

We'll always miss you.

asri 'bassruler. shuffling.

2009-04-26T16:55:00.002+08:00

Click here if you want to use YouTube instead of Metacafe.

I finally edit my own shuffle video. And here it is, enjoy. :)

Staying away.

2009-04-25T22:37:00.006+08:00

Hey. You might know me, or you might not. And I might be just a stranger. Why, do I write such things for today? Why not the last time? Why? Because, I recently am staying away from my friends, avoiding myself talking, or even if I talked, I say it with a small voice that is left behind after the most of it just hides. And that which left behind have a strong will to make a sound.

My best friend says, "ambung kau hari ani ah". What is my answer? I just take a look at him, do the fist way of hand shaking on him, and continue on being that 'ambung' person of which he just said.

I somehow remembered everything, of those painful past. When I was getting what I don't really want. When I started to learn what life is. When I first suffer of the biggest mistake that I have done. I won't mention what happen, but now that I get the pain out of it, I have to pay it back so that I would get through it. How do I pay the pain? By forcing myself..

So I cut and bleed my hand, just a little, before. And that who once care, once again care of me. She asked, "Why?" and even said, "Tell me that you're not in a mood," and continue with, "So, personal problems?" Then what? I cover that cut part with the scarf that I brought, and continue holding it with my other hand. I looked outside the window which is just near to where I was sitting, just to made her go away from me..

By then I started to question myself, if she still cares of me, why did she hangout more with that guy, rather than with me who keeps myself free whole the time? I keep thinking and think, of the past that we were into. And once I started, it's impossible to end it with just that part of my life. It also will bring up the memory of those who I once loved, those painful moments, and those things that I have to do just to stop it.

I once again have started the way that I argued last time. The way that I said, 'Why' something, 'Why' something else, to that person. I changed, and I will stay this way until that it happens again. That I would change back to this self of which where I was a bullshit. Nothing stops me doing this. No one would even stop me, cause you know, I didn't show.

I will, do everything that I can just to be alone. Away from everyone. I do need friends, family, but, I too need loneliness. So, let me be alone.

Short one for yesterday.

2009-04-25T13:20:00.003+08:00

Hey. I have once again went to the beach. Yesterday was the second time of the week. And again, some pictures are taken as proves.

Now all of that was when before we reached and just arrived at the rock. Below are the pictures that we take when we went back home.

Now, that's the end of it. And this is my house. So if anybody wants to see me, maybe wants to beat me up, kill me, knife me on the neck, just come and do it in front of the house. I was scared to die, until sorrow fills me up. Don't you mention a word when you meet me.

Every smile, every happiness that I am in, don't really exists. I tried to forget everything when I am with someone. Family, friends, even strangers. All the same. The unforgivable lies of which I have to force myself to be happy. And that happiness is just the feelings that I will never again have. Not even once. That wide smile, will never be on this face ever again.

Now, to the next post.

Introduction of S15+

2009-04-22T19:17:00.002+08:00

S15+
TEEN ROCKOUT

Hey. What's up for today? I told my friends that I will make this S15+ team. And, one of those friends accepted the request to leave that team that I am about to abandon, and join this S15+ team. I don't get any answers yet from the others. Just one.

What is S15+?

S15+ is a short form of Shufflers Fifteen Years Old Above. It's a shuffle team, which accepts Shufflers, and also people who is capable on making techno songs around the age of 15. No, it is not Sweet 15, nor the family of ST12 which is a band.

Where is it?

S15+ is a team from Tutong, from Danau to Bukit Beruang.

When and where will you practice? Is it safe?

When, that depends on our time. And where, it'll be at SMSO, most of it. Because there's not any other place for us to gather. If one of us have driving license and a car, it will be in other places. Safety isn't guaranteed. Just get ready to get bitten by dogs. Or what people mostly say, 'Beware Of Dogs', either they mean it, or it's just beware of peoples who will make you leave that place.

Any rules of S15+?

Yes, there are. In order for you to join, you will need to be at least 14 and a half years old. And you are called as 'Junior'. And the maximum of being in this team is 20. Older than that is called as 'Senior'. Yeap, same thing as school. While the 15-20 years old, they'll be called as member, or crew. As for the DJ, how old is that person, it doesn't matter. As long as that person have the beat on the bass.

Others, is to express, not to impress. Not to fool around with other dances, cause they might fool around with us shufflers. have well, and join up shuffling when there's a practice. Since that it's school, so wear your school T, or the uniform. You might get kicked out by the security if you don't.

Please be active in shuffling. If I caught you inactive for 3-4 months, then I'll straight away kick you out of this team. Be honest of telling excuses. If you're not active in shuffling, you should at least share your shuffle video with the team.

I'm sorry if there's too much rules, but this is in order to get the team well controlled.

What is your hope on this team?

Well, I want it to be the well known shuffle team, which is at least being in the top 10 of Greatest Shuffle Show in Brunei, which I hope there's such thing.

Well, that's all about it. Goodbye!

Yesterday, the beach.

2009-04-20T17:10:00.003+08:00

Hey. Okay I was suppose to post this up yesterday, but since that I don't have the time to upload the pictures that I edited, so here I am posting this up.

You know, this can be a nice bookmark. Hehe. But I guess it won't with this bad English of mine.

Okay, I don't really shout. I feel uncomfortable, if I shout at that time because my sister is there jogging along with me.

As I always did, I watch the view first. Then it's just a little aerobic, and straight ahead for a jog.

[click to zoom]

Okay, this picture is taken when we are on our quarter way there. Okay, less than quarter. And obviously, as I said, my stamina increases. Because I feel less tired than the last time before I jog. Hmm, must be those sprinting test that our Physical Education teachers gave. Thanks teachers! :D (FTW, I don't like sports. My only favorites are jogging and bicycling. But unfortunately, I don't have bikes.)

Take a look at that picture! Our destination is at the end of those big rocks. I would continue on, but my sister saw that those tree blocked our way through. And the only way is just walk through those waters, but my shoe won't made it. It's almost torned up. So we just turn around, and there, I start to do what I need to do just to reach my satisfication level.

Instead of shouting just to reach my satisfication level, I just sprint up and practicing my breath-in-2x, and breath-out-2. Which is a long feet jog, and first two steps, breath in, and the next two steps, breath out. Continue on, and make sure it's two times breath in, and two times breath out, which is the same moment as your leg reached the ground.

I don't know about you guys, but that's the only way for me to remember to breath while jogging or running. I've always been holding my breath before. And I've been shouting and hitting my head because I didn't even reach half of that beach. How stupid is that? Very.

<- That way! Hehe. This is actually my movement when I shuffle. It's still in progress. This position is used when Shuffle T. It's the spinning of hat, and close-open hand while Shuffle T. It's still in progress of training, because I don't spin my hat a lot.

This is the picture especially to ZE shuffle crews! Don't worry guys, I never did forget all of you. And I heard you guys missed me? We'll continue on, soon. :) As soon as it could be. Err, until the end of school? Hehe.

Okay, now below pictures is when we reached the place where we started. Yeah yeah, I didn't take the front view of myself. But who would want to see this ugly face? Nobody do, so just forget about it.

Okay, di-breakup. I never did tell you guys of why do I write my blog URL as 'di-breakup'. Obviously, it's because that I, or what my home name is, which is Diddy, or Di as short, and breakup, is the breaking up of me and my ex relation. We don't really hate each other right now, we're just being back as we were, which was an old friend. Okay, forget about this breakup thing. Continue on with the next picture.

No more. What did I mean of this no more? No more of this boring life. No more of this suffering. No more of this pain that I am into. And much much more of no mores, which I wish there won't be in the future.

S15+, this will be my next team. I will be passing WARS to my assistant, or just delete it. And 100% deleting STB. So goodbye to those teams, I will be leaving them. And then, this S15+ will be my next active team, and also the team of my school-year-mate.

To tell you guys the truth, this is my first hat ever. It was a giveaway when I was still in Primary School. And now I'm leaving it there.

And once again, as always, I would write 'I WAS HERE' whenever I'm leaving. So now, I'm leaving this beach. And I'm on my way to my house. But before I leave, I take a short last look of the view..

While I take a last look, I'm starting to miss my hat. LOL, okay I'm just kidding about leaving that hat. Hehe. Well, the wood stands. I wish I can stay until the sun sets. Well, goodbye beach. And goodbye guys. That's just it for yesterday.

Early post.

2009-04-19T04:23:00.003+08:00

Hey. Well, it's Sunday, the most useless-time-spending of the week. Just laying here, playing games, listening to musics, singing to it's melody, more laying, watching video, and when it's bed time, I just straight ahead sleeping.

I actually didn't sleep. Because, I have slept on the afternoon for three hours. And I should be sleepy by now, but not even a bit that I am. I'm guessing that I'd start getting sleepy by 6AM. Then might woke up around 10AM - 3PM. And my longest sleep was from 10PM - 2PM. I did woke up, but continue on sleeping. What a great dream I had by that time..

The time now, shows 4:32AM. It's just my favorite to get the numbers arranged in time and date. 'Cause it's rarely happens. And this year, the moment that I'm waiting is September 9th 2009. Triple 09. :) And that's just once in a year. How about 2013 next time? It won't happen 'cause there's no 13th month.

Okay let's talk about yesterday, which what happens when I was schooling. Period 8-9, Co-Curriculum. I was suppose to play basketball with my friends, but I left my sport tee. Not accidentally, I meant to leave it because I intend to leave basketball club and move out to English Reading club. Or maybe photography with my friend.. I don't know.. And, those who left their sport tee are suppose to be just watching. But I, and one of my friend went to the canteen. Drinking, eating, talking, and we even make some beat by hitting stuff.. And what I mostly do is looking at the sky, daydreaming. End that.

I have done much watching recently. Movies, Animes, Trailers, Technologies, Dances, Musics, and Game stuff. Which I don't really want to, but I just did. 'Cause it's not like I have anything else to do. And what I mostly watch is what I found that my sister watch which is Korean, Boys Before Flowers. Quite funny, and unbelieveably shocking. Those who wants to watch it, go to this website. http://www.mysoju.com/boys-before-flowers/.

Now, it's 5AM, and what I expected to happen, it happens much earlier. I started to yawn, twice. And now it's three times. So I should sleep now. Good night.

Well I don't know. Hmm..
It's just makes me interested..

Yeah..

2009-04-17T16:45:00.004+08:00

Hey. I realized that I didn't publish the posts like the past ones. You guys might be wondering if I was busy or just have nothing to write about. Well, that's not it. It's actually because that I was trying to figure out this stupid problems that I am into. Not just about that forgetting stuff which I spoke of last time, but also school problems. I'm much worse than before.. So god, help me with this.. I really need it..

I tried to change everything, and by everything, I meant the common things that 'we' have. I started to act serious at school, much day dreaming when I have nothing to do, hearing the same 23 songs by an artist, more careless of people, disobey those fucking orders, and.. I even change my hairstyle from emo to messy. By messy, it's not messy as hobo, but it's like from the emo starting place of my head, to all the way to cover my forehead. Which the picture, I will show you guys some other day. And about those pictures that I mention last time, I would also show you guys some other day.

Now, what have I done for the first time today? There's actually two things. One which is maybe just a piece of cake for most of you guys which is cooking my own mee goreng. And the other one is that I have done it through my computer but not my laptop which is playing mmorpg online game.

Okay, I haven't mention that my sister-in-law is in the hospital, and stays there which I don't know why. But all that I was told is that she is out of energy that she can't even moves. And she have a baby, which should be feeding on her. And it's a poor thing to both of them.. You have my sympathy..

Yesterday, and also the on Tuesday I guess, I have watched two animes which the name is Amatsuki and Piano. Piano is kind of interesting, well to me, because I'm interested in playing it. What I actually wish to play is violin, and also drum. But I guess not..

Right now I have wished for a mask. Not a special one, just a plain white one. Just to cover up my face as a shuffler at school. Cause what I heard from my school mate, our SMSO shuffle video is spread out. Well what I wish is that if I shuffle at school, there's more to follow me, but I guess it just won't happen. They'll just watch, and do it secretly at home. Just like I did, but now I'm spreading it. Hoping that I would make a new team called S15 - Shuffle Fifthteen. Logo would be circular arrows to show that it's 'shuffle' and '15' in the center. Pretty plain..

I am what you can call memanat right now. What am I doing you asked? Well, just reading a boring thick book. Guess what it is? Oh yes, it's a dictionary. It's not that boring, cause I have the will to use the difficult and I-don't-know-it words.

Hmm.. I guess that'll be it for today's post. I'll try to be more active on blogging. And I know my blog is boring because it doesn't contain a lot of pictures. Yeah yeah, I would put up some pictures if there's to share. And also that there's a lot of words, that made you feel like learning.. Okay, I'm off. Bye bye.

Do you remember..
That 1000 things..
I wrote of you..?
I have finished..
And I.. Will..
Throw it away..
Without..
A single word..
To keep..
Except..
I love you..

I..

2009-04-15T20:28:00.003+08:00

Hey.. There's not much to talk about, but I'll just tell you guys what happened for today.

Well, I have a history extra class today. And I'm staying at school until that class ended which was at 3PM. And around 1PM, I noticed that there's folded paper in my pencil case, which I didn't put it there, or should I say that it's never there before I left class at 12:30PM to take my laptop and buy a drink..

Yes, of course that I've open it up and read it. It's a.. Err, love confession? I wouldn't say that it's a letter cause it's just not. Back to that part, it ask many questions about this love that 'we' might be on to. No, I won't share the content of the confession, but yes, I do answer it. And according to the 'PS' it says that just to leave the paper at the back of the class, so yes I did. What I answered, is clearly a nice rejection..

2PM, students of religion school came to use our class. I'm the last one to go out, cause my laptop was on, and I was listening to the musics through short earpiece. I was about to go, but I saw two girls still, sitting there. The only question is why, and if one of them is the writer, which..

By the time that I was standing near the class door, and looked at those two girls, I started to think, "Argh! Why do I even care of this? Remember, that I have rejected that confession!" But still I wanted to turn around and take back that paper, but I just continue on. Off I went with my friends, and still yet, listening to some songs. Full volume. So whoever tried to talk to me, I don't have to talk to them, cause I don't hear a thing..

About 2:05PM, I guess.. Our teacher isn't here yet. So we, as in me and my classmates, sat down on the bench. While sitting, and once again, still listening to the music, I saw one of the girl who was at the back of my class. It's obvious that one of those two are writing it, cause she looked at me when she just arrive there.. But where's the other girl? Maybe, still in the class, or maybe in the toilet. Being sad of the rejection.

Not a long time then, I saw her going up the stairs, and walk to her friends. They start to talk.. How should I know what they were talking about? I'm the one with 'full volume-on earpiece-deaf with music'! I don't hear a single word of what they speak of. So is my friends. I feel like I'm hated, that I'm the only person who isn't talking.. Well, who cares..?

Then not long til then, our teacher came, and of course, we started our lessons. End of extra class, I once again listen to the musics in my laptop. I do bought my laptop bag, but it's full with books. So I just hold the laptop, and plug in the earpiece, and that earpiece goes to my ear, which is why it's called an earpiece. ~~FTW~~.

End that confession and school stuff. Okay, I had my haircut, again, on Sunday. Just shorten my the side and the back so that it looks short when I wear songkok at school. I only wear my songkok when there's IRK on that day. Which is almost everyday except Monday and Thursday..

I just remembered that I took some more pictures. For the first time, in school shirt. And there's the movements of my hand on my face when I was sitting down, bored. And the other one is 2L 1S, which you will understand later when I showed the picture. Just wait for it to come.

Well, I'm off watching some videos. Good bye!

Well..
I...
Uhh..
It's..
Complicated..
....

Finally.. But..

2009-04-13T18:53:00.003+08:00

Today.. I finally get over her.. Through hard work.. Through great loneliness.. And also, through stressfulness.. That made me forget, and fill my mind with other things. But, by that time that I was buying a drink at school.. The picture.. Of that angel, was there. And everything, went back just where I started. From the beginning of the confession. This sin, will never be forgiven. Though you forgive me, but not me myself. I'd never forgive myself..

Soon, this will just be a story. Story of that boy, who stupidly done something without thinking, who spent his time just to waste it away, and the boy who finally is awake after those dream, and suffer in that world which he is awake in. Just a story, with just one real thing. The others are fiction.. What is that one real thing? The writer, his expression.. It's the only thing that is real.. Soon..

I did say to you before, that if one day you'd say 'Hi' to me, I would just walk away. Yes, just like that. Even if you shout, even if you ask your peoples to block me, I'd still walk away. But if you manage to stop me walking, don't think that I would even say a word. Even though you suffer me, I won't talk..

That, if you said a single hi word. If you say 'Hey, do I know you?' The simplest answer that I'll give is that 'No, you knew me.' And while you're working on that laggy thought of yours, I'll let you think as long as you want, but I'll just walk away after that day..

Are you mad? If you are, then don't be. If you don't, well good. Because do you know why I did that? Because the last time that I have a relationship with you, I have made a lot of mistakes, that I would not care before it ends, because I was that idiot guy. And because that I have promise to do so, and every promise made by myself just for my own self, must be done. Unless I have lost my mind..

Is this not real? Is this kind of interesting? That people keep reading this, without even noticing that I here, the writer, is the person who really is in the situation, but what do you readers say? It's just a story! It's not just a story! It's a memory! The memory of which there isn't enough light! Whatever.. You guys never been in this crazy stuff. And those who never been, will never know what it feels..

Off..

Haunted..
Your love isn't pure.
What do I know?
Almost, everything..

My absence.

2009-04-11T15:54:00.003+08:00

Hey. Today, I'm absent at school. I don't know why I don't feel like going to school for today. I plan on going to the beach for today, but I guess I won't made it. Cause maybe I'm too lazy to go outside. Of course, not to jog. But just to take a great beach view. My favorite..

Speaking of this jog thing, my stamina of jogging obviously increased. I can see it. Last time that I jogged at school, I remember end my jogging around art room. This week, which was on Monday and also Wednesday - Physical Education. I jogged, and well reached the parking lot near the canteen. Person who is or was schooling at SMSO - Sekolah Menengah Sayyidina Othman will know how far it is.

Being quick is just a something that I wanted. Another thing that I wanted is to be defensive. So I have to watch a little combat shows, and the tutorials, train by myself so that it doesn't look too obvious. And also, I need to get my abs ready, in case someone punches or kick me on the stomach. Ouch. Well, happens. Screw you.

Well, just as I thought. I didn't even go to the beach. Tomorrow, morning I guess. I'll remember to bring along my small book. Maybe I got the word for the none-of-your-business. But my prediction, is that I won't get even a single word. How can I get 5 paragraphs without even a single word? It's never going to end.

This life, of where us people, live in. Is indeed a cruel world. No one is always happy. And speaking of life.. It started, through family. Father, mother, us. Followed by our own child. But that is not what I'm trying to talk of. I'm trying to say that the start, we actually just care of those in our family. We don't really love them. And by them saying love, they meant care..

Family is the first who we will get our relation with. Then it's school friends. And more school friends.. And then, there's friends at work. And through school or office friends, we get best friends, just friends, girl or boy friends, scandal, gay or lesbian friends, or whatever you are interested in. Stop right there, talk about girl friends.

Girl friends, if the relationship works, you guys would end up married. If it doesn't, well it might become a scandal if you-know-what happened, or might just become one of the exes. But it's not that easy just to get it over with.

What I'm trying to say is that we love our girlfriends, and we care of our family. Other than that, we love this world. But if we really love that person, we only live, because we love that person, and not just live because of ourselves. Which is what I'm into right now.

I love this person, and now that we're separated, I feel loveless. And I only care of my family, and my life. What I love, is the view of this world, and also the girl. Number one, girl and me, separated. Number two, what if I get tired of the view? Answered easily, suicidal happens. Cause everything, is gone. And there's like no more point to continue on. What's the point of studying? What's the point of us living in this world?

NOTHING!
It's just love that we need..

Opened up topic through Secondhand Serenade - A Twist In My Story lyric..

So you see, this world doesn't matter to me,
I'll give up all I have just to breathe,
The same air as you till the day that I die,
I can't take my eyes off of you..

So true. Well, end.

Secondhand Serenade.
Tested and True.

I'm scared we'll fall apart tonight,
Under the moonlight,
Under the moonlight..

I'm scared we'll never make it right,
Under the moonlight,
Under the moonlight..

Take my hand and hold it tight,
Hold it tight..

COMPLICATIONS

I know I said so, so just do it. No matter what I said. Just go away from me. I need you, but please, I don't want you. Just go away. It's much complicated. I asked for your forgiveness. Don't forgive me, forget of me, forget everything. Refresh that mind of yours, get an amnesia, and just go away. Don't come back. Though I have cried once again, and regret of this. Just don't come back..

Continued.

2009-04-10T22:24:00.004+08:00

Hey. Okay, continue on with yesterday's.. What was it that I want to continue on..? Oh right. Of me that I made promises to myself.

It's true, and it's done last two years of which I was in Secondary 1. What I can say of myself that time, is that I was weak, and I still am. But weak, weaker than this. I was a coward, much of idiot, full of stupidity, craziness, and crossed blood. By crossed blood, I meant that I regret of those times that I did wrongs, faults, that I have to be blamed. And that, I wish it's the last time that I have to regret of things.

Let me tell you my school history. I started a fight, of him who annoy me, when I was doing my work. And I made a teacher mad, because I was mad, mad because that I was innocent but still am being punished, and thankfully that my discipline stops everything of being reported. But the news goes by, cause my so-called friends have a big mouth. Since then, I started to promise myself, not to start a fight, or being mad. Just be patient and more discipline than before.

And after those of what first happens to me, as experience, I've made promises.. Like such..

I am weak, but I was weaker before. I cried, a lot. I'm being a coward, of all the stuff done to me. I'm full of alone, and you know? No one ever cares..

Cry.
Being weak.
Being a coward.

I am an idiot, and full of stupidity, craziness, and crossed blood. And by crossed blood, I meant that I regret of those times that I did wrongs, faults, that I have to be blamed.

Being a stupid, idiotic person.
Being a crazy person.
Regret the past.

I started this fight at school, to him who annoyed me when I was doing my work. And I also made a teacher mad, because I was mad, mad because that I was innocent but still am being punished.

Start a fight.
Out of control.
Not being a patient person.
Not being discipline person.

All of it, is way true, but it doesn't took a day for me to do it. I only do it when I have the time. Like on holiday. I wrote it on some paper, and I take it as a debt. A really big debt to myself. Above, is just a little of everything. And if it's the whole everything you want, you'll have to be my best-est friend in the world so that I'll tell you.

I'm just going to end it right here. I need some sleep. So, good night.

Bad mood.

2009-04-10T00:04:00.005+08:00

Hey there. Not much going on for today. Just some movies, videos and musics through my laptop. I'm so out of date. Just watched 17th Seventeen, which was last year, or was it the year before..? Well I don't know. The heck of it. My comment, a great movie! :)

Okay, everybody shouldn't be up on Friday night. Because most of the world know that Friday night, there are scary stuff around. But the heck of me. I'm not the only one who's up anyways.. My two online friends which is here in Brunei is online too. And we chat right now. Hehe.

You know, everyone wants to avoid diseases from themselves. They don't want to suffer of those pains. And most of those everyone, must at least broke their own heart. Compare both those pains, and having your heart broke is much more painful. And if you got both broken heart and disease, you have someone who cares about you. And that is what I wish for. Someone to care about me. So I wish I have a deadly disease, like whatever they are..

Actually today at school, I saw what 'she' was doing. By she I meant my friend who admitted that she likes me. Yes I like her too, but I'm not going to say yes cause it's school. What she was doing, was walking around with other guys. And another time, walking again and with different guys. I know that those guys aren't her relatives. I know she's just being player to us HBI-face. What's HBI you asked? Well I made that up, so just guess. I'm never to tell it.

Speaking of this likes, my exes at my current school is just one. Yes, and I'm in third year. That ex was like in my second year. The first year, my girlfriend was in other school, which we started our relationship in primary 5. Yeap.. Young love.. I was an idiot by that time. Oh, right now too. Yes, I only have 2 exes, and currently single, and planned on going single forever and ever until death.

I'm in a bad mood today, I don't know why, but I feel the inpatient-ness of bullying, kicking asses, punching eyes, pushing down, twisting hands, smack back and whateverelse.. But I've promised that I won't. And there's much that I have promises myself. And if I break it, I would punish myself through of what I'm able to do.

And you know, this is so the opposite. You're in bad mood, I'm in a good mood, and the other way around. You smiled, I'm mad, and the other way around. I'm talking about last time, and also today. If we kept it strong, it would be forever, and I won't have to hold this sorrow of great pain..

I guess this is just a 'to be continued'. I'm going to have a little rest. Good night..

60th post.

2009-04-09T00:21:00.010+08:00

Hey. Okay this is my 60th post of this blog. Compare to my old blog which was 'http://asri-kun.blogspot.com/', it reaches 150 posts, but yeah I changed it, cause it's not checked out everyday. I'm too busy with my life anyways..

Last post, I post my blog about at 3AM. And how about right now? It's 12:30AM. 24 to be exact. Hey, I mentioned about shuffle yesterday right? Well, it doesn't really went as expected cause I didn't tell those friend of mine it's today. And they only get the old update which was tomorrow.. And I actually have English extra class. Escaped. Hehe. It's quite easy, so yeah. Next week for sure!

Well, I was on my way home after this shuffle stuff at school. I was bored waiting, so I asked my mom about this new 'SPN' stuff. I didn't actually know how it really work. So, I need it explained. So I asked stuffs that I don't understand, and founds out that they are on easy kind of learning, but hard way of examination. Hard, I meant 'normal' level because they didn't use to exams such as this PMB that I intake of..

Okay back to the time at school. I was thinking really hard of this question. No, it's not a riddle or anything. Just a plain simple question. I don't quite remember how that question goes, but for sure it's an easy question. But since that I think too hard, which is through scientific mathematic ways of solving the question, and finally gets it wrong. This might be the moral of the day. Which is..

Don't think too hard!

You might end up thinking really hard of the easy ones..

You know, this thought that I have, speak much of a lot. But I actually talk less, with a hard face put on. I hardly smile without any good friends, brothers and sister, and some jokes. I never really being honest of showing my own feelings to others. Not even my best friend, girlfriend, and my family. I hid that expression through my plain hard face, or even a smile, pretending that I just heard a joke.

I don't want to hide it.
But I just can't show it..
It's such a pain to be me.

Not every single breath is filled with happiness, joy, fun, and greatness. There's much of a lot of pain, sadness, suffering, bleeding, ~~fucking~~ bullshits, and don't forget boredom. Though, it's such a waste of our 80 years of life. 80 years, isn't that long. I wish to live, forever. To seek of who I really love, of who I really am. Because I got stabbed by who I have made mistake of, and made a lot of lies of myself, which confuses me, and makes me don't know myself anymore.

You guys will never know what it feels like unless you saw it through your eyes. Or unless, you've been there.. But as what I see, many never have been there. Many just being a player of this love. Do you know what is love? Let me explain.. This is what my opinion is. Of being a true man. Of not being a player. Of being a serious in relation.. Of course everyone knows.. Men are perverts, if they're not, then they are just waiting for the time or what we all say is being patient. Or maybe of their bad past.. By here, pervert wants sex. But this through this, you will understand that I'm a little different. Or am I..? I'd say that..

Sex isn't love.
But love, is sex.
So mind your love.
It's the true sex.
The sex is bullshit.
Small words that have big and deep meaning..

Okay, the post is quite long. And I'm writing this for half an hour. Yes, it's 1AM right now. So I'm going off. Good bye.

Never hates of who you have once loved.
Because it's such a waste of time in our short life.
Once again, our life is short. So why not enjoy it?
Because, it's full of pain. Pain that took away our happiness.
Pain that fill our life with revenge, hates, sorrow, and tears.
But you know..? What we actually have to do is just forgive.
A simple, nice, and true forgiveness. Of what it is in the past..
And through that, you can enjoy your life. You can even change..
Try your best.. Just forgive..

I'm not just saying it. It really is true.
I'm not boasting. I'm sharing.
Because, only the truth lies here.

Hmm..

2009-04-08T02:31:00.003+08:00

Hey. It's half past three in the midnight. No I'm staying up whole night. I slept at five o'clock. And woke up at eleven. Short sleep turns into 6 hours of sleeping. My sleeping period is such in a wrong time. Not that I blame someone for it.. Well, I'll just try to change the timing.

Hey. It's half past three in the midnight. No I'm staying up whole night. I slept at five o'clock. And woke up at eleven. Short sleep turns into 6 hours of sleeping. My sleeping period is such in a wrong time. Not that I blame someone for it.. Well, I'll just try to change the timing.

Yesterday, in the morning. Our English teacher test our Oral Test. Of course, as usual. I did well. I manage to control that nervousness that I have. You know, I sometimes forget the word, when I have that nervousness. But since that I have been with strangers lately, being friends with them. Well, yeah. I lost that feeling. Not that I'm nervous because of the questions. It's the person who test me and also the person who is around me, and heard me. Yeah, I have problems with that.

For tomorrow, or should I say today, later on the afternoon. I made a shuffle gathering. But bad news is that a lot of spectators. I get all those 'Bah shuffle bro!' stuff. And you know what I said? I said.. '~~Fuck~~ you'. Hehe.

Now, I'm doing my Maths homework which I would have done if I haven't sleep for six hours.. And other than that, I download up some techno songs for tomorrow. Yes, I'll be bringing my laptop tomorrow, and also perform shuffle.

Well, without wasting anymore time, I'm going now. Cause I have lots more questions to do. So goodbye.

the-bassruler@live.com.

2009-04-06T16:40:00.004+08:00

Hey. I just got back from my Science extra class a while ago. And I wrote my note using this laptop. Hehe. I was tired of writing. So yeah.. Okay, I have made a new e-mail which will be my primary e-mail in the future. Unless I changed my nickname or broke my leg and can't follow the beat anymore, or I quit shuffle. The e-email is 'the-bassruler@live.com'. Add me up! :) Okay skip that. Now, I have complete the editing of my pictures. Here it is..

ON SCHOOL HOLIDAY

The 'ZE thinking' style.

The 'Lifting up spectacle' style.

The 'Base picture' style.

The 'Hmm?' style.

AFTER SCHOOL HOLIDAY

The 'sleepy wipe' style.

The 'not-so-scary-glare' style.

The 'concentrate thinking' style.

The black thing on my arm.

*No, it's not a tattoo. It's just an easy-wiped-off ink.

THE NEXT DAY

Face cover number one.

Face cover number two.

Face cover number three.

Face cover number four.

Face cover number five.

End of face coverage.

Don't even think of commenting on my chatbox, talking about this ink thing. I know what you would say. Yeah I get it. It's not like I always am doing that. Just often. This is the third time in.. My whole life? Don't really remember.. Okay, might as well end this post. It's much longer than ordinary ones. Well, goodbye!

Like A Knife is a favourite.

2009-04-05T18:26:00.006+08:00

Hey. Good evening guys. Right now, I'm editing some pictures, which I'll post up on the next post. And speaking of posts, I forgot to post up stories in TC-oS. Sorry readers, if there's any..

It'll be Isyak soon. After I'm done with praying, as always, I'll be having dinner with my family. And after dinner, I will do my Science homework, which was suppose to be handed to us before school holiday. But teacher forgot about it.. :/

Yesterday, I accidently slept in Study Room while I was reading stuff on my laptop. And I didn't really study in that room. In addition, I secretly call it playing room. Cause I did much playing on that room. Hehehe. Shhh. :P

Okay, tomorrow will be the second week after school holiday. I haven't get used to school yet. I don't know why the time feels like it's gone so fast. Though I'm bored, the time still gone fast.. Maybe it's just me..

Many times that I have changed the position of the speaker in the study room that I am in right now. And right now, I am changing it's position again. I don't know why do I like the speaker so much. Maybe I just love the bass..

It's been raining before Maghrib nowadays. And also some thunder in the afternoon after school. It's good that it made me cold by that time. But I'm done with cold because there's an air conditioner in here. But everyone know this word. "Shit happens". Bad luck is everywhere. The unwanted dislikes arrived anytime.

About Secondhand Serenade, well almost everyone know about it. Their singings are so wonderful. My current favourite song of Secondhand Serenade is 'Like A Knife'. I'll underline which part that I love. It's not just I love it, it's like that song is me.

I dream a lot, I know you say,
You've got to get away,
The world is not yours for the taking,
Is all you ever say,

I know I'm not the best for you,
But promise that you'll stay,
Cause if I watch you go,
You'll see me wasting,
You'll see me wasting away,

*Cause today, you walked out of my life,
Cause today, your words felt like a knife,
I'm not living this life,

Goodbyes are meant for lonely people,
Standing in the rain,
And no matter where I go,
It's always pouring all the same,

These streets are filled with memories,
Both perfect and in pain,
And all I wanna do is love you,
But I'm the only one to blame,

[Repeat *]

(But what do I know if you leaving?)
All you did was stop the bleeding,
But these scars will stay forever,
These scars will stay forever,

And these words, they have no meaning,
If we cannot find the feeling,
That we held on to together,
Try your hardest to remember,

Stay with me or watch me bleed,
I need you just to breathe,

[Repeat *]

For me, that is the best song of Secondhand Serenade..

Well, I'm off doing my 3 pages left Science Revision Paper, and after that I'll do some more picture editing. Good bye and good night!

For today.

2009-04-04T15:43:00.003+08:00

Hey. For today, I have lost a lot of sweat and energies due to sunny weather and also the arranging of furniture in the study room of my house.

At school, it was a hot day, and I was sleepy the whole day. Maybe because my sleeping time have moved from 10PM to 2PM.. Or maybe because I'm just used to it. Well the heck of it. Then, on almost-school-end, CCA period, we have sport team whatever something like that. Which I 'MKI' or in long term 'malas ku ingau' to join a part of it. And that waitings worth nothing.

I remembered the word that keeping people wait for something is rude. So the teachers made us wait for whatever it is, the teachers are rude! ~~FUCK~~ YEAH! So to teachers, don't made us wait! Or we will make some noise, run away, and even have a party without inviting you!

Back from school, after those arranging furniture stuff, I took some pictures of myself. Of course, not just today that I took my own pictures. So is yesterday. What was in that picture? For sure that it's my face, my hands, and also one other thing which I'll show you when I'm done editing it.

Hmm.. Mmm.. What else to talk about? I guess that's just it. Well, good bye and enjoy your day..

March test result is out.

2009-04-03T17:19:00.003+08:00

Hey. Yesterday, I got my record book back. Well here's my result.

Malay Language: 64% [21/35]
English Language: 63 [3/35]
Mathematics: 55% [4/35]
Geography: 62% [5/35]
History: 47% [22/35]
Science:63% [4/35]
Commerce: 63% [3/35]
MIB: 42% [29/35]
IRK: 82% [11/35]

Overall mark: 541
Overall position: 5/35
Average mark: 60.11%
Class average mark: 42.25%

I'm asked to do better on the Co. Subjects. Yeah, I'll do that in order to get into 4 Science.. FTW, my maths got beaten. I guess I'll have to concentrate on Science. Well, that's all there is. Good bye.

Get..

2009-04-03T14:32:00.006+08:00

GET OUT OF MY LIFE!!

GET OUT OF MY MIND!

You're such a ghost in every side of my life!
Can you not be there just for this one time?!

SO JUST GET AWAY FROM ME!

. . . . .

Well..

2009-04-02T00:30:00.004+08:00

Well you don't know...That I am sad.. That I ran away.. That I am hiding.. I'm dying.. Suffering.. Bleeding without bloods.. In pain, without wounds and scars.. Since that we're gone.. Both gone.. And heart broken.. Both of us..

But you know what..? I never regret it! I never do, and never will.. Because for me.. Every heart deserves to be breaken. Mine especially, because.. I'm that idiot guy who did stupid things. And that stupid thing break everything. Inches by inches, meters by meters. And it ends up destroyed, with not even thin air. Vanish, just like that. Impossible, but true.

And this, all of this! Not just us, but every part in this world..For me it's much of simple, but complicated. But no one cares. Not even a single soul. What is there tomorrow? Just so you know, I'm not thinking of anything else, but you. Other than you, it's the weather for tomorrow. Because I will go out.. Just for me to see you, and you to see me. Eyes, by eyes. Face, by face..

So what is there tomorrow? Will it be sunny? Or will it be wet..? Will there be you? It's been a long time.. How are you..? That's what on my mind. Not just right now. It's every time. Nonstop! Which is why I have problems sleeping..

Both, sorry and forgiving, is easy to do. But because evil fills up our heart, forgiving is such impossible to people.

So you, you know who you are.. I ask for your forgiveness on my wrongs and sins, but fire fills you up. You said that you're sorry.. But no. You're not the one to do that. I am the one!

The other you, you know who you are.. You ask for my forgiveness, after everything. I forgive you, that quick. Without even thinking, of what might happen. Because I'm that careless person..

This isn't a fairytale, or 'just a story'. This is reality. That what I've been on. That you would never been into, because my life, isn't yours. And it's you who will know my emotion base on what I've written.

Once again that this is me, talking, in full of sorrow.. Starting straight forwardly, and ends with these last words..

I don't want or need that second time..
(Or maybe that I do..)
All I need is you to say that you forgive me..

1st April.

2009-04-01T17:18:00.002+08:00

Hey. Time starts, never stop and keep on going.. And now it's the 4th month of the year. And it's been half a month, that.. Well I better not talk about it because I don't want this blog to be filled up with my feeling of sorrow. But I'll just tell a part of it which I'm way sad of this on March. Four online friends lost. They aren't just normal online friends. They're cool, and nice peoples. And we even promise to meet if we afford to though..

Don't even think that I'm catching girls from other countries! Two of them are guys, and other two, girls. Of course, they're in country far away. Not too far though. The far one is at... USA? I guess.. I don't really know which country is the most far from Brunei. :/

Okay enough talk about that. Today is 1st April and it's April Fool for the fools. Congratulations to to those who manage to prank someone for today. And that's the end for that topic.

Well, I have edited the first page of my blog, or what I call it the 'welcome page'. What I change is the one "Lyric of the 'half a month'."I changed it to "Music that express me". So that I can change it everytime I wanted to. For now, it'll be.. Err.. I'll let it blank. Cause nothing express me right now..

Okay, the process of composing songs, stuck. If I knew the way it is, I'd be publishing it by now. But since that I'm a noob of it, so learning is the best way right now. And I'm going to keep on learning, and this blogging is kind of my way. So goodbye! Until the next day. :)

What suffers me is your smile.
Are you doing that to suffer me?
Just to keep suffer me, so that I have painful life?
Well you made it. It's much of painful that I'd kill myself.
Are you happy now? So just let me go.. Free me out of you. Help.

WTF??

2009-03-31T23:11:00.004+08:00

Hey. Okay, I was back from school, at about 3:30PM. And I was like VERY tired. So I open up my laptop on my bed. While I was waiting for the download to finish, I blog a little, but since that I'm dozing off when I blog at that time, so I save it as draft and continue it later. But then I watch this short video at metacafe. Before that video end, which the video is about a minute, I just doz off.. And missed my 6, 7, 8, 9, and 10PM. In other words, I missed my Maghrib prayer, Isyak prayer, and dinner.. Bro, kenapa inda membangunkan kediaku? :/

Okay I just ate my dinner, late dinner to be exact. Now, I'm doing my correction on Geography test paper. Which I am suppose to do it on school break. But I was absent the last day, so I'm given right now. After Geo, I'll have to finish my Science revision paper. Kind of stress me out. It's easy if I refer my notes or textbook, but I'm just so lazy that I write everything that I know..

Okay, I don't want to waste anymore time. So off I go doing my work. Goodbye!

I finally.. have my long sleep..

It's 2AM..

2009-03-31T01:52:00.003+08:00

Hey. It's 2AM Brunei time, and I'm still awake. Plus, school's tomorrow. ~~Fuck~~ you school.. Speaking of school.. Yesterday, period 1-2, I have Physical Education as the subject. And we were asked to do the push ups. With fear, I looked at my shadow, and I saw my hair, reaches the ground. FTW. Woohooo. Long emo hair. Hehe, finally beat my fat ass friend. In your face! :P

About this hair, this is the longest hair I've ever got in my life. From the middle, it reaches the center of my nose. From my left, below my eye. Heh.. And I thought it's short. I just keep thinking about stuff and ignore what I see in the mirror..

Okay, let's bring up the last post's topic. Which was about composing my own song. I've been searching the whole day through google. No freeware software anywhere! And that rhymes! And the good news is that I finally found it. If you want to get one, just search 'FL Studio' at google. :) I just download it about a hour ago. So I'll try tomorrow at school after extra class. Hehe.

Speaking of this composing song stuff.. I have done a great concentration of thinkings on words. Well, other than making some techno songs to get the 'DJ' infront of my name, I also think that I would publish my own song. Not just being a DJ or lyric writer, in addition, an artist! :) Hey, I'm ugly, and I'm an artist. Nothing is wrong with that here in Brunei! Our name won't get the hell out of this country anyways!

It's 2:15AM. And I'm thinking that 'Why do I think too much on blogging?'. I blogged in almost in an hour.. Well except if that person is waiting for something to post up in his/her own blog.. Oh bullshit. I forgot to post up stories in TC-oS. But I'm glad that there's not even a soul visiting that blog. (I guess...) Hehe. Oh well, just post up two stories tomorrow then. Or three stories the next day.. :P We'll see..

Okay, I'm going to bed now.. I mean I'm going to sleep now. I say that because I'm on bed right now. Hehe. I've been tired whole day, after all that ~~fucking~~ Physical Education.. Well, good bye! Have a great life! :)

Are you doing that to suffer me..?

I'm falling..

2009-03-29T21:57:00.003+08:00

SHey. For the second time, I once again falling in love with guitar, trumpet, drums and others's melody. And I have found a video called "How I composed my music". With that I'll able to make a song. Can't wait. Hehehe. And so my wishlist is updated.

Learn to play music instruments.

I wish I'd be able to learn. And that will be the second thing I'll buy once I handle my own money. First one is a mobile phone, and that's a must because I might be away from my family. Or lost somewhere. So yeah..

Lastly I'd want to say thanks to metacafe for bringing up that one video. Hehe. :) Well, goodbye!

Still.. You..

Loses.

2009-03-29T06:38:00.004+08:00

Hey. Good morning.. You know, if you are one of the contact in my MSN, you'd know what I loses. Well, if you don't, let me tell you now..

I lose the ability to cry..

Yes, that is what I have lost. Although pain fills me up, I'd hardly cry. You guys might be saying that "Hey, you're a guy!" Who says boys don't cry? They do cry! But you just don't see it, because we're hiding it..

Back to the main topic which I loses.. I have loses the ability to cry, and now I'm much sleepless than before. Will I lose that ability to sleep too..? I might sing this song my Craig David, Insomnia, until my last breath..

Tomorrow is school day. I wonder how I'll do tomorrow. Maybe something will disturb my mind. And maybe that would make not do any work, and fail in this very huge, very important, challenging, one-chance PMB exam.. And then, I see what that failure brings me in the future. I'll then be a farmer, and that's the least. Because what I've learn in IRK, ianya adalah pekerjaan yang paling mulia disisi agama..

It's seven AM, and I'm still wide awake. No yawning, not feeling any weight on my eyelids, and not even a single day-dreaming.. I know, what I'm in to. This situation, is all my fault. It's my doings, that I became like this. Such idiot I am.. Nothing can cure me. Even that it's the cure, I won't be fully cured. Because I have done a stupid thing.

And you know what? I admit it, that I'm an idiotic, stupid, crazy, ~~bullshit~~, ~~fuckin'asshole~~ person.. Let's rewind a little.. About me losing that cries.. Am I just can't cry anymore, or is it like D'Masiv - Cinta Sampai Disini..? Let me get that paragraph up..

Bila harus menangis, aku kan menangis,
Namun air mata ini telah habis.

Which is that my tears all dried up..? No, that's not it. It is that I'm sick of sadness, that I force to fill my own self by strength or madness, smiles, happiness, and the nothingness. And you guys know what? Yes, I have accomplished that. And what I feel inside is just the same, only without the expressions on the outside. I really hides it inside, very very deep inside me.. Deep down as the 100th hell in the world. Though it doesn't exists, that is how deep it is. And the feeling I felt is sadness.. The feelings that makes me want to cry..

I'm ending this post right now. And off to beach for great breath. So, off I am right now. Good bye, and I appreciate you read this post. I really do.. Enjoy your day..

I just wish that you'd read..
You know who you are..

Let's hack our old VCR!

2009-03-28T17:16:00.004+08:00

Hey. I told you guys that I'll share a video with you guys. So here it is! Watch!

Hehehe. :) Well, have a nice day!

TC-oS blog activated.

2009-03-28T15:31:00.003+08:00

Hey.

Well the TC-oS blog is now activated. Do visit it at http://TC-oS.blogspot.com/. Before you leave up an idiotic comment, read the intro first.

Belait.

2009-03-27T19:06:00.002+08:00

Hey, I just got back from KB. Got a new frame of glasses. :) Last time was black-yellow. This time it's black-scratchy silver. Other stuff I bought is, pen, glue, A4 papers, small notebooks, some sweets, nuts and Strawberry Mirinda. :P

Speaking of Mirinda, I haven't drink it for.. Almost half a year. So yeah, I missed it. :) I have a video to share with you guys, but I'll post it up later. Cause right now, I have to do something else, which of course, I don't want to tell.

Back to this KB story, I saw this guy. No, I'm not gay, he's just a primary school friend of mine. I missed that moment.. I mean, playing around with them, hustle, punch kicks, push and stab. Hehe, I'm kidding. :)

Well, off doing something better than this. Good bye!

The hair.

2009-03-26T22:17:00.003+08:00

Hey. Well around 8-9PM, which is just about a hour ago, I looked around and I saw lots of hair at the bathroom. FTW? It's nothing. Just my hair. I just have a haircut. At least I'm quite comfortable with it now. Same style, but shorter. :)

I'm having an orange juice and thinking of some words. I don't know what words, but I just keep thinking about it. And no, I'm not out of my mind. Not yet I am.. Now, I just have to enjoy watching and playing games on Metacafe. Just some simple games. If I'd play those online games again, it'll be a great percentage of confirm that I will fail in PMB. So, I controlled the wants of me playing games.

Oh, out of orange juice. I'll fill it up again later. :P Or maybe not.. Okay, about this laptop, there's a Photoshop. Well every laptop does. I mean, Photoshop is the best picture editer in the world! So why shouldn't it be in every laptop? Right? So yeah, I didn't get used to it yet. And I just hate to try it and keep failing. I only get used to Paint.NET. It's almost the same as Photoshop, but much easier I guess.

Hmm.. Okay, I'm off searching for food. :P A little hungry. Hehe. Well, goodbye, and goodnight! :)

Mmhmm...

2009-03-26T13:16:00.001+08:00

Hey. How are you guys? I'm just fine, and here I am, sitting on my bed, clicking the keypad of this new laptop of mine. Of course, to blog. I am seriously very happy about this laptop. BUT, this happiness is fading away, cause you know.. I..

Well, I saw the person that I once loved yesterday. Yes, there at BSB. I saw her with him, again.. She looks great I guess, but she seems strange somehow. But all I'm sure is that it's her, and with that guy again. All I can say right now is that I really missed the way we were. But there's just no way to go back.

I should be squeezing my head with the word, 'What's past is in the past'. You know why? Cause I keep on remembering my past and wanted to change it. Or maybe I should be sticking up with this word instead, 'Forget everything that have happen'. Yeah, that's a good idea. I should be doing that. I'll be knocking my head tomorrow.

Hmm.. What's my plan for tomorrow..? More exercising. Jogging, running, sprinting. Push ups, sit ups, and pull ups (But unfortunately that the steel at the back of my house is too high..). And a small weight liftings. Others, watch TV, being alone and hear some stupid songs. How emo..

Well I guess that's just it. Oh right, I forgot one thing. Which is that http://asri-kun.blogspot.com/ will no longer be used by me, and I'll be posting the stories to another blog which is http://TC-oS.blogspot.com/. So just check it, or don't, because it's not ready yet. :P Okay, now it's over. Good bye and enjoy your life!

NEC laptop for me!

2009-03-25T21:27:00.003+08:00

Hey hey. Well I just got back from BSB. Not really 'just got back', I was back by Maghrib. And yeah, I got my laptop. NEC type. What it write here is NEC Versa S5600. Well whatever. Hehehe. Atleast it's my favourite kind which is XP. :) Oh and, it's way over my budget. B$998. FTW. I owe my parents B$298! Oh well. I just hope that this laptop won't break down for a long time. I repeat, for a long time, with an infinity 'o'.

What else...? Oh right, goodbye brother Azhar. Goodluck with your Teaching Practice. May you be a great teacher. :) And... I'm going now. I have to arrange up stuff in this laptop. So, goodbye and hope you enjoy your school holiday!

About my laptop..

2009-03-24T23:48:00.002+08:00

Hey. About this laptop that I told you guys about. I'll be spending $600+ of my own money, and MAYBE just MAYBE, use my sister's hard disk. WTF! I don't want that! If that happens, then it's like spending my only money and gave it to my sister! NO WAY! I want my own space for my own laptop! Okay? Dad, please don't be that person who is too 'jimat'-ish..

I want my own property, without sharings. Especially the things that I love very much! And the laptop that you will buy for me, I will love it very much that I don't want to share it with anyone. I do share it but not for a long time.. Half a day the most..

~~Fuck~~! I hope the laptop is especially for me.. I don't want to spend this money that is just for me, and use someone else's part. That'll be 5 thumbs down, the other 3 will be my.. Well it doesn't matter if I mention them..

Well, I guess that'll be it.. Goodbye.

Mudah mudahan, aku kan dapat laptop atu, just for me, and bukan beshare share.

Sleepless.

2009-03-24T05:57:00.003+08:00

Is it that serious, that I can't sleep for the whole night? Am I that broken, that I can't sleep? That I can't even get sleepy, and rest? I blame myself, I'm the one who is wrong. I'm the one who decided to not be there. And I'm the one who made that mistake..

It's never you. If you are a stubborn person, you would be posting me something to tell me that you forgive me and that you want us to know each other once again, but for truth by this time. All of that I just fine to heard by others. But as for me who is in this, I don't want it..

I don't want us to start back, I don't want us to introduce ourselves for the second time. Second time isn't what I want. I don't know how to say it, but that's what it is. So just accept whatever I decided, and try to get me out of your life. I'd hit my head hard till I get amnesia if I were you.

This is me, now. Start straight-forwardly, and ends without anything.. I'm out.

Wednesday.

2009-03-23T20:19:00.003+08:00

Hey, I just received an update of information on my 'new laptop'. I will be receiving it on Wednesday. I'll make sure that it have a big space so I can store it up with crazy musics. But too bad that if it's small, I guess it won't have a web-cam to chat with my online game friends. I guess I'd just have to buy the web-cam too then.

Well just to inform that. Good luck with everything, and goodbye.

Black..

2009-03-23T19:13:00.004+08:00

Hey hey. For today, I overslept. From 3AM, to 4PM.. I do woke up before, but I went back sleeping.. Now I'm so satisfied after all that sleeping. By 4PM, I woke up and have my suppose-to-be morning shower.

I wear black for today, to show that I'm dying, suffering of what I am right now. I may not look like I am, but all of that is just the act that I am used to. And the truth is what I'm telling you guys right now. Suffering, dying, and feels like screaming. But I have enough of shouting..

The last post is much of lies, lies about my feelings. But I should be that way because it's a nice happy day. But really, everyone lies. No one ever NOT lie. Prophet do lie, but for goodness. And most of us now, lie. Lie for sins. We are not those who seek the sins, that we don't want. But it's just what we do. We should be ashamed for everything, but we just don't..

That person, you know who you are. I missed you, but it just ends like that. You said that you don't want to talk to me anymore, and now you said why am I like this.. And that you still want to talk to me. I just want you to know, that I take everything seriously.

And please don't say that you are sorry. I don't want it, I don't need it. I don't want your sorriness. What I need is you to forgive me for everything that I've done to you. I mean really, I never thought that I would break my own heart after what I've done to you. It's just so complicated. And this isn't just sayings, it really is true. And so you don't trust me anymore, but I just don't care about it. All I care is to tell you everything. And it's just up to you to believe me.

This isn't the past. This is the present. We can't change the past. All we can do is to continue on with the present. So, it's just up to you now.. Is it a goodbye, or is it a welcome back. And this is just another end of my post..

Woohoo!

2009-03-21T23:27:00.001+08:00

Hey hey! Well first of all, for today I'd like to say welcome N95 to our family. Not mine though, it's my Bro Ariffin's. :) Once again, happy birthday brother. :D Then, I'd like to say welcome back home for 10 days my Bro Azhar. :D Bro, on Monday yeahh? :P

Other things that I'd like to say is that..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!

Hehehe. Long live, and may you be more beautiful by you're older. :) And and, thanks for the ice cream. So yummy the very. Hahaha.

Well, my brother got N95 to spend his $700 with. What's mine? Well my dad say that I'd better buy a laptop. A small XP one. :D Well, if he said so. At least there's more space to put music in, and I can now borrow my brother's phone to record a vid. :D Dad, hurry up with the laptop. Iski sudah ni. Hehehe.

Today was so much fun, though I didn't go to the Shuffle Session that is held in Swiss Hotel in KB, or go to The Mall with my family today, and they told me that there's a lot of stuff going on there, such as shuffle and break dance show or whatever it is, ice cream eating competition, and others..

What did I do while my family have fun at Bandar Seri Begawan? They were there for like.. from 10AM, to 6PM.. Enjoyed much FTW. And I was making a new character playing the online game.. Hahaha. :P

Well that'll be it I guess. Sorry, there's no picture of the ice cream we ate for my mum's birthday. My brothers and sister didn't bring their mobile phone to take picture. :P Okay, tomorrow's Sunday. Just chill kay? Just like we HAB family do. :D

Holiday is here!

2009-03-20T20:37:00.002+08:00

Hey hey! Happy holiday! :D I hope I can enjoy a little in this short holiday. I mean really, what can I do at home? Let's see.. Playing more games.. Listening to a repeat song of Secondhand Serenade, Craig David, and Chris Brown.. Watch TV.. More blogging.. Jogging.. And stuff.. :/ Bored of that. ~~Fuck~~ you boring stuff.

Okay, soon I'll be making an idiotic comic made out from the online game I played. Just a little screen shot, and edit it a little. Finished it, and taa daah! It's done. :) Well not yet. Heh.. Just a little more stuff to share about. Bro Azhar, bila balik? Kan meliat Watchmen jua ni. :P

Hmm.. Oh right, I have pick a theme for my 'Story Collection' blog. It'll be released out of the jail before or maybe by the end of school holiday. :) So just be patient and wait for it. Well, that'll be it for this plain boring post of mine. Bye bye, and enjoy your holiday!

Connection problems.. ( -_-)-p

2009-03-18T18:16:00.002+08:00

Hey hey! Okay I hate this thing that happens to me. Not just me, my brother too. When we use the laptop or PC, the connection will sometimes went down. I don't know what's going on with that modem. I think it's drunk after the party yesterday. Well, the heck. Just have to be patient..

Okay, today was a painful day. Not that I'm suffering, but I'm just tired with all those writings, copying, thinking, and walking around passing papers. I regret sitting in front of the teacher's table cause I'll always be told to pass papers that the teacher wants to give.. Well the hell out of it.

Now I'm free!! Hahaha. I'm not going to attend school tomorrow, and start exercising for stamina. I feel like joining the race. :) But with this low stamina of mine, I won't even reach the end..

I'm bored.. Okay, I'm off playing more online game. :P Gila game aku ani eh. Hahahaha. :D Well, good bye, have a nice day. :)

I almost forgot!

2009-03-17T18:35:00.000+08:00

Hey, I'm back blogging. :P Just a short post to say..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BROTHER ARIFFIN! :D

Sorry, you won't be receiving anything for today. Just wait for mother's birthday. :) You two will celebrate it in the same day. Okay, I have two more things to talk about which is about the 'name on paper' thing and what happen just after I end my last post. :)

About the 'name on paper' stuff, I said that I'll post it up later, and by later, I meant now. :) Here it is!

Well it's just a random dumb sketch of mine anyways. But most of my friend said that it's raget. :D

Okay about what happens after I ended my last post, I watch this Shooter movie, and it was like 2PM that time. And it ends at 4, I think.. Yeah I watch it till it's over. And when it's going on the credit, my eyes just went blurry, and everything flows down on my bed. SLEPT! Hahaha. For a hour. :P And I planned to play online game that time. So I just play it after Maghrib prayer. :)

Well! That's just it. :) Bye bye, and have a nice day for tomorrow. :D

10 days of break is coming.

2009-03-17T13:20:00.004+08:00

Hey. Woah, it's been three days that I haven't blogged. Not that I'm busy with anything, but there's just nothing to blog about.. Okay, school term is coming. I wish I'm free.. So that I could go anywhere I want. I am allowed to go, but I can't drive, and I don't like to ask people to drive me around..

Okay, there's not much to talk about. One other thing is that I have done my name on this paper, well my friend say that it's nicely done. I'll post up the picture later, cause I'm using my cuzie's laptop. :) And it doesn't connect to the scanner.

And another thing is that I borrowed the speaker from my sister. :) Just to listen songs with louder volume so that I can throw my stress out. And so that I can hear what the movie character said. And by movie character, I mean I'm watching DVD on laptop, and the voice is just so low.

Well, I'm going to watch the movie now. The DVD is bought a long time ago, but I haven't watch it. So this is the time. Maybe you're wondering what I'm going to watch. Well it's 'Shooter'. :) Okay off I go then. Have a nice day! Good bye, and until next time. :D

New pictures.

2009-03-14T22:10:00.005+08:00

Hey hey, I have a new picture! Well not very new though.. But after all the times that I have taken the picture, now is the only time that I have to edit and post it up here. :) Here it is!

:) The very thanks to my sister for letting me use her mobile phone to take picture. :D And.. that sister of mine also got her laptop or what she call 'lappy' back. :) And our cousin's laptop is still around. I don't know why she don't want to bring it back, but as my sister told me, that cousin of ours ask me to use it for a moment.. So...

THANK YOU CUZIE. :D

Okay, I guess that will be just it for this post. Goodbye, good night and have a nice dream. :) Oh right, one more thing.. Who will be eliminated in today's Akademi Fantasia? :) And another thing, who will win? Liverpool, or Manchester United? :D

PS: I say.. Soccer sucks. I mean I don't like sports with a target. Like.. Football, soccer, basketball, etc etc.. Except for badminton of course. :)

Pet Society & Typing Race.

2009-03-14T02:57:00.004+08:00

Hey. Okay, I have a FaceBook, which I don't really post much pictures, cause I don't have a camera. If I do, there will be thousands of it right now. So much for no pictures, so I just play the games or applications there. Here's some pictures. :)

PET SOCIETY

ºThe quality looked sharp because I make it like that. It's laggy for this PC when it's smooth..

TYPING RACE

Join, and play with me! :P Seriously, I'm getting bored with just a small amount of friends playing pet society. :) Oh look at the time. See you guys later. Good bye!

Wishlist updated.

2009-03-13T14:24:00.005+08:00

Hey. By now, I don't want any mobile phone, iPod or MP4 too. So it's time for me to change my wishlist. All I want is Walkman NWZ-E438F. Well obviously because it have a long expectancy of battery. 45 hours of music and 8 hours of video. :D I do want a mobile phone, but nahh.. It'll get in my way of studying..

Okay, so it left me 7 more days until school break. At least I can jog a little throw out my stress after all the hateful studying. Not that I hate study, I like it but it's just that my friends are that annoying which makes me unsatisfied in learning. I mean really, teacher explains, friends talk, friend got mad by teacher, friends complain. Their own fault, and they complains about it. Oh just shut up and study!

Well, I guess that's just it. Much shorter day by day. Good bye, and have a nice day. :)

Akademi Fantasia.

2009-03-10T01:57:00.003+08:00

Oh yeah! Akademi Fantasia season 7 is now activated! Well I don't really like the past ones, but I'm supporting this one! Why? I don't know.. Maybe because one of them is a shuffler from HR - Hardstyle Revolution from Malaysia it selves! And who's that person? He is.. Aril! Or as they called him, Ajam?? I don't know.. :P

I support him, shufflers support him. And I want him, to be the first who is on that voting screen! I guess that he will be because there's a lot of them who knew him, and he is quite a good shuffler. Which maybe makes him voted by lots and lots of people. And maybe even beat Mawi! :P World world world person.

Well whatever. That ends the post. :) And don't forget, to all shufflers. Don't waste your credit on giving them to your girlfriend or whateverelse. Just...

AFUNDI ARIL! :D

YEAHHH!!! Hahahaha. Okay, good bye and see ya. Have a nice time back in school!

Exam is over.

2009-03-07T19:24:00.007+08:00

Yeahh!! At last! The exam is over! Now I could relax a little. :) Okay Commercial Studies was okay I guess, not that hard, not that easy. And the bullshit one is Melayu Islam Beraja. I don't know there's like an essay to it! I mean really.. WHAT THE ~~FUCK~~? I think, oh wait, I know, that I will fail in Melayu Islam Beraja.

I was thinking and thinking for an answer to come to my head, while waiting.. Guess what I do? Take a look at the picture below. That's what I do..

I took a tissue and my black and blue pen. Sketch it randomly and it turned out to be like that. What an art! :P I wouldn't say it's art, it's a rubbish. I mean really, it is drawn on a tissue paper! It's not like I don't have any papers by that time, but it's so not what you called 'good quality' if I use a paper.

Okay, let's bring up another topic.. Like..... Mmmm... Oh yes, I joined bruplace today. You should try it too. It's like a Brunei version of Facebook! Join it, and believe me, you won't regret it. Or would you...? If you do, you just have to wait for the next updates by the admin. :)

Hmm, I guess I'm all ideadout. :P Blogged you another time, good bye!